بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Perhaps you didn’t know that what you did made them Martyrs.


Perhaps you didn’t know that what you did made them Martyrs.
Opinions on Marriage
○ requires thought, DETERMINATION
○ Prophet (SAW) to Jabir (RA), a man who told him got engaged: “did you look into her eyes” – meaning did you find love in her eyes? Did you spend enough time looking into her eyes to know she’s the one? Marriage isn’t something you just come by!
○ 1. Optional love:
You lead yourself to love and you fall deeper in love. It can grow if you allow it to grow; you need to take concrete steps, not just sit back and wait.
■ eg: your love for your spouse gets deeper as the relationship progresses
■ there are things you didn’t know that you love today, and things you loved then that you love in a different way now
■ We live today in an era with a lot of “popcorn love” → it’s not how I met your mother; it’s how many people met your mother
● The types of love that we are fed is a vain type of imagery and people make millions off of it – it’s AN INDUSTRY
● eg: Adele’s Someone Like You – national anthem of a home wrecker. This is the kind of woman you want to keep away from your husband. — THAT’S WHAT’S PUT OUT THERE AS A LOVE SONG… but it’s actually the love of desire
● We raise a generation of people that think that a booty call is acceptable, that someone can ring her up at 9pm.
Surah Al’Imran:14
“Beautified for people is the love of that which they desire- of women and sons, heaped-up sums of gold and silver, fine branded horses, and cattle and tilled land. That is the enjoyment of worldly life, but Allah has with Him the best return.”
■ “Beautified for people is the love they desire…”
● what they love is what they want to do with the person for a certain amount of time
● the guy/girl that compromises your relationship FSA, they don’t love you – they love, the desire (difference b/w love and love of desire): عشق andحب
Imam Ibnul Qayyim RH differentiates between ■ a was عشق whilst love noble and pure was حب says
He ● has forbidden, beyond the limits type of love. قشع is when someone goes to haram measures to be with the one they love outward same, set Allah boundaries the cross you – عشق ● characteristics as love
○ Anything you do in the name of love through sin/ compromising Allah’s boundaries is NOT love. Anything you do would you where love flaming that is عشق ○ for that person, that anything is what puts you in trouble
عشق as someone to love your explaining avoid to Try ○
○ If someone is willing to compromise their relationship with Allah swt, then nothing is stopping them from compromising you to have you why is that→ حب from your prevents عشق ○ heal and purify your soul from the love of desire
● The difference is simple, Allah loves when you love, بح , Allah loves that, but when you are upsetting Allah, that is قشع
● love is conciliatory, it’s being able to talk about the difficult things – “I didn’t like the way you said that”
○ you’re a tree that’s planted deep, not just fluff- you know the person is there to stay
○ 2. Non-Optional love
■ we’re asked to guard our gaze against the Haraam because we can fall for the unattainable
■ That love is not Haram, but acting upon it in Haram means is! The Sight/Eyes
● Hijab is not about the beauty of the women
○ if it WAS that, prophet Yusuf would need a hijab Lolz.(women cut their hands upon seeing him)
○ Yusuf, when they saw him they would “Akbar”, say Allahu Akbar, and they would cut their hands → if it was about beauty, then Allah would have put a niqab on him
○ that wasn’t the logical step
○ Cultural construct: Khateeb says something like “summer’s here bros, be careful” → cage them before they POUNCE 😛 → THIS IS A PERVERSION
■ sexuality and nudity was much more rampant at the time of Prophet (SAW)
■ At that time, if a woman was owned, a woman would be forbidden from covering above the navel… that is how pervasive nudity was
■ Paternity was so loose, that when someone was married they were married to the tribe, anyone from the tribe would lay claim to her
○ That is why we are told to guard our eyes → it is your duty as a man to run away from the Haram, it is inexcusable to say “I couldn’t help it”; it was much worse in other places
○ It is a sexist thing we have in our community is that we lower the standard of men; that is not Islamic
● One of the issues in marriage is a man who cannot guard his eyes – it is not embarrassing just for the women, it is embarrassing for him in front of Allah SWT.
● the sight is the quickest access to the soul/heart
○ Prophet (SAW) – that’s why you close the eyes of the deceased
○ Prophet (SAW) – The sinful glance is a sinful arrow of Iblis that strikes the heart
○ The eye is the easiest gate to the heart
○ There is no sinfulness in a man looking at a woman for identifying them, or doing something professional; the only problem is the fitnah in the heart
■ If you appreciate a person as a sexual being, then that is when you turn away
○ Prophet (ﷺ) telling Ali (RA) – the first look is for you. But if you return your gaze for a sinful reason (ie to “check them out”) then it’s sinful.
Narrated `Abdullah bin `Abbas RA: Al-Fadl RA (his brother) was riding behind Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) and a woman from the tribe of Khath’am came and Al-Fadl RA started looking at her and she started looking at him. The Prophet (ﷺ) turned Al-Fadl’s RA face to the other side. The woman said, “O Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ)! The obligation of Hajj enjoined by Allah on His devotees has become due on my father and he is old and weak, and he cannot sit firm on the Mount; may I perform Hajj on his behalf?” The Prophet (ﷺ) replied, “Yes, you may.” That happened during the Hajj-al-Wida (of the Prophet (ﷺ).
Sitting behind the Prophet (ﷺ)
○ Ibn Abbas RA said, “a woman of spectacular beauty came up to Prophet (SAW)”
○ Ibn Abbas RA noticed the beauty and restrained himself so Prophet (SAW) didn’t turn his face
○ However Al Fadl RA was, so he turned his face for him
● During the time of the Prophet SAW, segregation was not a rule,
○ Prophet (SAW) stood on a pulpit at a woman’s request – so she could see him during khutbas
○ the same pulpit is going to be beside Al-Kauthar on the Day of Judgement
**SIDE NOTE** We will all pass through the sirat through Jahanam, each at different paces (based on your answer regarding your relationship with Allah)
● When we walk through we will say “Praise be to Allah who saved me from your torture”
● Then you will walk through the qantara ( a bridge), and that is when you will have to make the recompense for the wrong you have done to others
● Those that will have most against us are those that we have spent most time with..it’s there you’ll find your wife, kids…
● not an easy journey to set balance straight with others Pornography
● one of the most proliferated vices
● technology is driven by this proliferation
● around the time of VHS, Sony tried to patent “Beta”
○ Sony was owned and operated out of Japan
○ Japan = very ethical
○ Pornography industry wanted to use Sony for filming…
○ execs said no thanks
○ VHS said “okay let’s do it!”
○ Sony developed Blu-Ray gave access to porn industry to
○ → the web applications you and I use are primarily driven by companies that want you to watch their porn
● sociologists say it’s impossible to escape your teen years without exposure to some kind of pornography
● Addicting – Mind has these synapses, you watch something and you want it more
● BUT luckily your brain has this “use it or lose it” function – if you stop watching this kind of stuff
Story of Mughith RA and Bareerah RA
Bareerah RA was a female slave and A’ishah RA was interested in buying her. She was married to Mughith, and Ai’shah freed her (they were married in slavery); a free woman cannot marry a slave man, so after she became free, she had the choice to keep this marriage or to ask for the dissolution of the marriage. She said, “Alhamdulillah, I’m tired of this marriage, I’m going to get out.” Mugheeth loved her so much, sincerely and
honestly. After she left him, he couldn’t take it, so he went into public weeping, chasing
her, asking her “Ya Bareerah just look at me or talk to me.” He went to sahabah and said,
“Please talk to her for me (to Abu Bakr and Umar and at the end, even to the Prophet (ﷺ) to ask him to intercede. So Prophet (ﷺ), (as the mercy for mankind) felt sorry for him, and he said he’d do it. When he went to Bareerah, she asked, “Are you commanding me or are you just interceding?” The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “I’m interceding.” She replied, “If this is the case, then I don’t want him”, and since all else failed, he spent his life chasing after her and crying for her. “The husband of Bareerah was a slave called Mughith. It is as if I can see him now, walking behind her and weeping, with tears running down his cheeks. The Prophet (ﷺ) said to ‘Abbas RA: ‘O Abbas RA, are you not amazed by the love of Mugheeth for Bareerah, and the hatred of Bareerah for Mughith?’
And the Prophet (ﷺ) said to her: Why don’t you take him back, for he is the father of your child?’ She said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, are you commanding me (to do so)?’ He said: ‘No, rather I am interceding.’ She said: ‘I have no need of him.’ ”
THE CIRCLE OF LIFE
Two Major Theories on Love (according to marriage therapists)
A Husband’s Guide to Ruining a Good Marriage
A Wife’s Guide to Ruining a Good Marriage
Love in the Sunnah pg 81
→ He didn’t just marry to help people, or just for sexual appetite.
→ Sometimes people asked him to marry them and he wasn’t interested, some of the prophet’s wives weren’t “sexually available” so that’s not why he married them
Allah says: “Know that the life of this world is but amusement and diversion and adornment and boasting to one another and competition in increase of wealth and children – like the example of a rain whose [resulting] plant growth pleases the tillers; then it dries and you see it turned yellow; then it becomes [scattered] debris. And in the Hereafter is severe punishment and forgiveness from Allāh and approval. And what is the worldly life except for the enjoyment of delusion.” ( Qur’an 57:20)
Happiness or Money?
“Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people that they don’t like.”
I believe that money can’t buy you happiness. Sure, having a lot of money is a great thing and gets rid of the stress of financial insecurity. But real happiness can’t be bought by money. Thinking about life has led me to think about this popular belief and realise it’s completely true. Although being financially secure is one of the best things in the world, it won’t necessarily bring you happiness. Many people dream of being rich. They think of all the things they can buy with money such as big houses, fancy cars, and long vacations. People make it their goal to get into a good college to get a good job and make a lot of money. With financial security, people think they have more time to spend relaxing and being happy. There are so many success stories of people going from “rags to riches” and people try to follow their footsteps and do the same thing. Basically, we all get this idea that being rich is a great thing and it will guarantee happiness, but is it true? On the flip side, there are also people who have gone from millionaires (karor pati) to living off benefits (road pati).
As Muslims we are taught to rely on Allah SWT for our sustenance, Allah provides. Obviously, tie your camel then trust in Allah. I would like to narrate a passage from a lecture of an Imam from Madinah – Shaykh Muhammad al-Mukhtar ash-Sinqitee (Allah preserve him): “The happiest of people is the one who addresses his complaints to Allah and not to his creation. The happiest of people is the one who puts his certainty in Allah and does not put his certainty in Zayd or Amr (i.e. people). If a person was in debt and your friend said I will talk to such and such a person he is wealthy. And your debt will be relieved very easily by that person. How certain will you be about your debt being settled and your hardship being removed?
But how about the King of Kings the One who has depositories of the Heavens and the Earth in His hand? How about the Most Generous, which the fullness of His Hand is not affected by the continuous spending, night and day. O Allah! Make our poorness to You, and our richness in You. Be rich in Allah, have trust in Allah. People turning away from you is indeed a blessing from Allah, He wants you to turn to Him.”
Abu Huraira (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) as saying:
“Many a people with dishevelled hair are driven away from the door (but they are so pious) that if they are to swear in the name of Allah, He would definitely fulfil that.” (Saheeh Muslim)
The happiest of people are the one who says, “Ya Rabb!” – and Allah answers his supplications. By Allah! Happiness is not in wealth; if it was in wealth, the happiest of the people would have been Qaroon, but he was amongst the most unfortunate and miserable of people, “And we caused the earth to swallow him and his home.” (28:81)
Wealth is not happiness and happiness is not when you ask people and they give you. True happiness is when Allah will open the doors of heaven for you, Allah make us from them. Ameen!
It was narrated from Abū Hurayrah (raḍiy Allāhu ʿanhu) that the Messenger of Allāh (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) used to tie a stone to his stomach because of hunger. (Ibnul Arabi in Mu’jam)
Money only makes a person want more money – it creates greed and thrives off the desire for more and more. I heard someone recently say regarding another person who has a fulfilling business that ‘he’s lazy and not enthusiastic’ simply because he has shown a level of contentment within his business and refuses to advance it further.
Why? Because, unlike many many others, by Allah, he has resisted that monetary lust and has sukoon/peace in the amount he has. And why was he called lazy? Because unfortunately, today, many people think that the successful and admirable one is he who is able to keep the revenue rolling constantly until there is more money than one will EVER need.
Abū Saʿīd Khudri (Allah be pleased with him) reported that Allāh’s Messenger (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) said,
“The world is sweet and green (alluring) and verily Allāh is going to install you as vicegerent in it in order to see how you act. So avoid the allurement of women: verily, the first trial for the people of Isrā’īl was caused by women. (And in the ḥadīth transmitted on the authority of Ibn Bashshar the words are:) so that He should see how you act.” (Saheeh Muslim)
The feeling of constantly wanting to generate money has terrible, subconscious effects on oneself. The person is in a constant trance-like mode whereby he is forever thinking about the next project that will bring him a profit and in this there is no barakah/blessings in his day for any extra Qur’an, adhkar and Islamic progression. Many so-called religious folks try justifying their love for wealth and materialism by stating companions such as Uthman Ghani (Allah be pleased with him) and AbdulRehman ibn Awf (Allah be pleased with him) who were wealthy… Dear brothers and sisters, with the wealth of Uthman (Allah be pleased with him) must come the Taqwa of Uthman as well! Scholars have also got sucked into materialism and consumerism, please see this article on scholars charging for Da’wah.
The Prophet (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) was seen by ʿUmar (raḍiy Allāhu ʿanhu) with dust on his clothes from having slept on the floor. ʿUmar (raḍiy Allāhu ʿanhu) wished to provide the Prophet (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) with a more comfortable bed and the reply was,
“What have I to gain in this world? The like of this world is as that of a traveller who is travelling in the sun and he sits under a tree momentarily and then gets up and continues on.” (Tirmidhi)
For example, In “The High Price Of Materialism” Tim Kasser says, No matter how many fancy designer clothes, cars, or jewels they might obtain, no matter how big their house or how up-to-date their electronic equipment, the lost opportunity to engage in pleasurable activities and enjoy each others’ companionship will work against need satisfaction, and thus against their happiness.
Happiness is the most valuable aim of a human being. While the earth is getting complicated and changing day by day, almost all people are trying to have a happy and fulfilling life. During this pursuit of happiness, our relationships play a crucial role. In the pace of life, when we have encountered some stressful or disappointing situation or cases, in order to take a breath we always consult our families and fly into our family’s arms. If we have our own families and their real support, it is the most reliable way to reach happiness and relief. But sometimes people can be in a dilemma between possessions and relationships. This is the point of collapsing real happiness because when the passion of money comes to a person, he starts to abandon his family. He thinks as if money will bring them happiness and a good life. But it won’t. As Tim Kasser says in the article of Mixed Messages “a focus on materialistic values detracts from well-being and happiness. For example, when spouses spend most of their time working to make money, they neglect opportunities to be with each other and do what most interests them.” And again in Downshifting in Britain
As you can see in these sentences as long as people don’t allocate enough time for their families, there is no way to make them happy.
“Difficulties in managing work-life balance can have a detrimental impact on the quality of the relationships between parents and children and the parent’s responsiveness to the child, with implications for child outcomes. This is particularly important for every young child, with evidence suggesting that it is best for children if they can receive intensive parental contact for the first months (HM Treasury & DTI 2003, p 13-14).”
The word ‘happy’ is defined by the Oxford dictionary as: “Feeling or showing pleasure or contentment,” however happiness means different things to each individual person. Most people’s definition of happiness would include words along the lines of ‘love’ and ‘health’, and others may include ‘family’ ‘friends’ ‘belief’ ‘achievement’ these are all things that money does not give you. The truly happy people I’ve known have been those who were engaged in meaningful work, paid or unpaid. These people were so busy living their lives in pursuit of something larger than themselves that they had no time to wonder, “Am I happy?” They just were.
The other most important step to reach happiness is our satisfaction. Because actually, the money doesn’t make us happy, it can help us just by providing some satisfaction. When we lost our satisfaction, it means we lost our happiness and this is exactly what our possessions do. Lots of people in consumer countries and societies think that they always need more money than they have now, even if they are wealthy and rich people. In the book of Clive Hamilton, this situation is stated with this sentence: “The trouble with the rat race is, even if you win, you are still a rat.” Because of the society that they belong to, they are convinced that more money means always more happiness. So without exception, all people are trying to have more possessions to be satisfied by being able to buy what they need.
In conclusion, I believe that money provides temporary satisfaction but that is up to you to figure out how to truly be happy. You need to start with basics like enough money for food and shelter, but if you try to build on your fortune then you must keep your priorities right; friends and family first. If you lose your money, then who will be there for you to catch you when you fall from that high horse that you have been riding for so long? Your friends and family. My definition of happiness would be living a healthy life surrounded by my family and friends, yes I would need money for food and shelter but after that, how much do I really need?
Anas bin Mālik (Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Messenger of Allāh (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) said:
“Whoever makes the Hereafter his goal, Allāh makes his heart rich, and organises his affairs, and the world comes to him whether it wants to or not. And whoever makes the world his goal, Allāh puts his poverty right before his eyes and disorganises his affairs, and the world does not come to him, except what has been decreed for him.” (Tirmidhi)
Ismail Ibn Nazir Satia (One who is in dire need of Allah’s forgiveness, mercy and pleasure)
24 Rabiul Thani 1440
(The Final Crusade)
Waheed Jensen is a Muslim male in his mid 20’s, struggling in this world with being young, open-minded and gay, trapped in a global community of Muslims who claim to follow Islam but lack the application of its most basic tenets. Working to make the world a better place for Muslims and non-Muslims alike. A version of this article appeared on Altmuslimah and VirtualMosque.com.
Ever since I began trying to understand life, one of the crippling realizations about the Muslim communities I reached was this: We tend to bury our problems in a dark hole, dismiss them and hope they will never come back to haunt us. But they often do. We overlook many of our familial, social and cultural issues until they multiply and are about to explode in our faces; at that point, we are notorious for pointing fingers and crying over spilt milk.
Our room is filled with elephants that we barely have an inch to stand, yet we remain oblivious and hope things will get better.
Allow me today to describe one of those elephants. A strange elephant. Allow me to dissect it and hand it over to you, that you may ponder and hopefully open your heart and mind.
Let me start off by saying these three words: I am gay.
Even though you do not know who I am, and maybe the mere fact that I just came out to you right this instant may offend you, confuse you or drive you away from reading the remainder of this article. Let me assure you, this is not one of those articles that tries to promote homosexuality or deliver an airbrushed and Islam-oriented version of all those pro-homosexuality arguments.
Yes, I am gay and I am Muslim, and I am here to offer you a small glimpse into a journey of struggles, passions and hopes. I do not intend to delve into the story of Prophet Lut and his people, talk about the evolution and progression of the LGBT community during the past century, present arguments for or against same-sex relations, or even try to prove my own opinion. I really hope you can read and reflect, and I pray that this small effort of bringing the picture a little closer to you might make the slightest bit of difference in raising awareness, and hopefully open healthy discussions on the topic.
I wholeheartedly believe, in concordance with Islam and its teachings, that sodomy is a major sin. I am against same-sex marriage and intercourse, and I am not in favour of any progressive movements that attempt to explain Quranic verses about People of Lut or sodomy from a modernist or post-modernist approach – in other words, arguments that try to find a leeway and claim that that is a legitimate Islamic perspective.
I hope that this will not drive away readers who are excited about the topic but may be uncomfortable with my statements. I have adopted this position after years of introspection, research, counselling and personal prayer, and I am coming forth today to share with you some of those experiences.
Homosexuality has been present in humanity for centuries, and for as long as it has been there, homosexuals have been struggling with themselves, their families and society at large. To me personally, there was always something different. I could feel it in me from a very young age. Something that I could not explain to others because I thought they would not understand, let alone accept, or maybe because I was too young and immature at the time that I was not entirely sure what ‘it’ was.
It crystallized around puberty; when all the raging hormones started kicking in, those tendencies became obvious. And then the real struggle began.
The struggle led to an explosion of questions. “Why am I different? Why am I not like the rest of my friends or family members? Is this even normal? Am I sick?” Not finding the proper answers, I kept on putting these questions aside. “Maybe it’ll go away. Maybe it’s just a phase.” In my case, it never went away and it was not a phase.
With time I learned that this is something abhorred religiously, culturally and socially. So I tried to adapt. “How do I balance between the feelings and tendencies I have with what my religion, culture and social norms dictate?” So I began a journey of self-exploration and interacting with others, learning from religion, media as well as prominent persons, like religious scholars and major social figures. My schemas kept changing, and I kept on adapting.
Many of us may be brave enough to rebel against what others seem to ‘dictate’ on us, while others suppress their urges, often hiding their identities from those closest to them, generally out of fear, or maybe because they are not just ready to come out yet. I belong to the latter group.
To this date, I have never had the courage to tell my parents or close family members, but I have come out to a close friend of mine a few months ago, and he was extremely supportive Alhamdulillah (all praises to Allah).
One of the most dangerous pitfalls I have personally experienced was thinking that God hated me. He was mad at me. “I must have done something wrong in my life to deserve this ‘punishment’… If God does not accept homosexuality, then why am I a homosexual?” Whether Muslim or not, people struggling in silence can be more prone to deviating to dangerous paths.
So, you find many struggling homosexuals also dealing with bullying, drinking problems, substance abuse, domestic violence, poor academic performance, career problems, pornography or sex addictions, sexually-transmitted diseases, mood disorders like depression and anxiety, and many other issues. (1) I had my own share of bullying, academic problems and mood disorders. Our struggles multiply with time, and many even contemplate suicide.
This is especially true in cases where the individual tries to discuss the issue – often it is just those desires or thoughts that are tackled, not the actual act – with his/her parents or family members who are not receptive to those ideas. If not shown sympathy, care and love, he/she is often shunned, harassed, scorned and sometimes even tortured.
A lot of gay men and women are forced into arranged marriages, taken to local Imams to ‘heal them from their calamity and wrath of God’, or even killed. (2) Some of them take their own lives by themselves. Others live in constant torment while some flee their homes and families in search for a more welcoming environment. That and many have not even yet engaged in any sexual acts whatsoever.
This is why I, along with many fellow homosexual Muslims, find the Western alternative very striking: It offers acceptance and understanding. Things that we dearly miss in our communities, even though we may realize deep down that there is something terribly wrong, the fact that there is someone who accepts us and fights for us and not against us is incredibly more appealing. When we try to talk to other Muslim seemingly-pious and God-conscious brothers and sisters about our sexuality and are shunned by their lack of empathy, respect and understanding, would you find it surprising that we take comfort in talking to non-religious people about our struggles in hopes to find an open mind and a loving heart?
Ironically, the spirit of Islam is all about empathy, tolerance and understanding, yet the practice of Islam carried out by many Muslims shows the opposite.
Trust me, I understand that it is a difficult topic to open up with others, especially people coming from conservative backgrounds. It is difficult news for you to receive, just as it is difficult for me to handle, let alone share with others. However, the fact that I choose to come out to specific people means that those people are exceptionally special to me. To us.
It takes a lot of courage, incredible determination and a full dose of anxiety and fear to even think about coming out to someone, that you can imagine the damage we have to endure when the other person dismisses us or shows no empathy or mercy. It seems like a lot to handle if you ask me.
I remember the first time I decided to come out to someone, I was going through an overwhelming period in my life, yet Alhamdulillah I had some seeds of piety and religiosity inside me. I was around 18, and he was a non-religious psychologist and counsellor. I went to an appointment with him, tried to beat around the bush but ultimately came out to him. And, he was accepting. Later on, I found out that many struggling homosexuals came to him for advice and counselling.
I was hoping that, with the aid of therapy, my orientation would change – this is scientifically known as reparative or conversion therapy; while many studies have been conducted on it and some patients have reported success, a great number of psychiatrists and counsellors have reported failure and more harm done to the patients than good. The progress of my visits culminated in him putting forward the idea of accepting who I am and going all the way with it – in other words, experience my entire sexuality without restraints.
At that point I was really uncomfortable with his proposal, as it was against my Islamic beliefs and my own virtues.
During that same period, I was doing my own reading and researching, trying to find a proper Islamic “solution,” crying for help and praying that I am guided to what Allah pleases. One of the most heartwarming responses was given by a psychiatrist who also has a profound knowledge of Islamic shariah (legal rulings). He was hosted on a TV show, and he was speaking so graciously, so open-mindedly, that his words hit the right chord and I was immediately awe-struck. I cried after finally having found an answer with which my heartfelt ease.
That was pure bliss, Alhamdulillah.
The gist of the talk is the following: Homosexuality as an orientation is a disorder in one’s fitrah (human nature and disposition). “Treatment” of such a disorder involves therapy, familial and social support, personal discipline and a whole lot of other things. However, this therapy, which is tailored on a case-by-case basis, may or may not work. The mode of therapy is different between individuals, just like every case of homosexuality is different between people.
Mind you, the term “therapy” here is used loosely to mean dealing with the issue from different aspects rather than reverting one’s sexual orientation.
If many of us, homosexuals, dive deeper into our childhood and upbringing, we can pinpoint certain events that have taken their toll on us one way or another. Many of us have experienced child abuse, be it sexual, physical or intense emotional abuse that was brutally damaging to our body and soul, or lived in dysfunctional families that ultimately caused a lot of psychological damage. (3)
I, for one, had my own share of psychological and sexual abuse as a child from people closest to me and witnessed intense domestic violence that crippled my mind for a decent period of time. Such events were so incredibly powerful that they became ingrained in my psyche and took their toll on my thinking and behaviour.
Others have been desensitized to issues related to sexuality and gender roles from a young age, that their perception of masculinity and femininity is quite erroneous. I can recall several stories of struggling homosexuals I know who grew up in homes where one parent was more dominant in their life (e.g. present most of the time while the other was absent, provided greater emotional, psychological and social support while the other did the exact the opposite), such that either parent’s gender became more dominant on their lives and personas, and hence their perception of gender and sexuality deviated from the normal.
It is worth noting, however, that many people grow up in normal environments with no such issues during childhood, yet end up finding themselves attracted to the same gender. So there is no discrete thumb rule or cause as to whether someone will end up identifying as a homosexual or a heterosexual. It is not a simple black or white situation.
In addition to the above, it has been asserted that there are other acquired causes – we are bombarded on a daily basis with sensual and sexually-explicit material, from billboards, magazines and newspaper articles, to online material on social media websites. Sex and sexuality are heavily emphasized in TV shows, readings and discussions, whether openly or not. We have become accustomed to seeing semi-naked and naked bodies, our concepts of beauty, femininity and masculinity have radically evolved over time and we have become desensitized to these matters. (4)
There is an unbelievable amount of time and resources spent on creating better bodies: muscular, dreamy and good-looking men, and gorgeous women with “perfect” facial and body features. In addition, many of the inter- and intra-gender boundaries have drastically changed over time. Taken together, these matters overwhelm the human mind, and the effects are undoubtedly palpable.
Again, these and countless other events affect people’s heart, mind, body and spirit differently. People struggle to cope in different ways. Some people, like myself and countless others, may eventually find themselves with a specific worldview, having had a culmination of experiences, as well as a specific orientation that may or may not be modifiable. Just like these examples are struggling in and of themselves, homosexual thoughts and tendencies are no less than struggles as well.
When I see married men and women sharing affection, enjoying companionship and raising children, it hurts. A lot. Not the jealous I-hope-they-lose-all-that kind, but the painful realization that this is not something I can ever attain. Because of my situation, my ibtila’ (struggle in life), the idea of marrying someone from the opposite sex is not practical at all or even fair for me or my potential spouse. Many shuyukh advice homosexuals to get married for their tendencies to dissolve; while this may work with a handful of people, a large number of us does not find it physically or mentally plausible.
Many of the things other people, including those shuyukh themselves, take for granted – like relationships, marriage and having children – are the exact things we struggle with day in and day out. Personally, and unlike Muslim heterosexuals, I do not have safe and lawful options through which I can channel and fulfil those desires. Therefore, I try my best to remain steadfast and struggle for the sake of Allah. If that is not incredible Jihad, I do not know what counts as such.
While it may seem unfair and even preposterous to some people to keep struggling and not fulfil our desires, especially in this time and age, that is where the beauty lies. Within Islam, we are not held accountable for our thoughts, feelings, desires and tendencies as long as we do not act upon them. There are three ideas worth mentioning here.
First, Allah has promised in the Quran that He “does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity” [2:286]. Taken in line with Islamic teachings, this means that Allah knows how painful my struggle is and knows that I can handle it. Every time I ponder upon this idea, I am overwhelmed with incredible awe and gratitude. Of all people across centuries, He has chosen specific people for this particular test. Indeed, life is nothing but a few years and the True Life is in the Hereafter, so no matter how agonizing the struggle is, there will be an end to it.
Second, there is an immense reward and unimaginable blessings, both in this life and the Hereafter, by staying true to God’s decree and struggling for His sake. The greater the struggle, the more the rewards in sha Allah (God willing).
Third, and just like the popular saying goes, “when God closes one door, He opens another.” So, if issues like intimacy and procreation may seem like dead ends for Muslim homosexuals, we find openings in other aspects of life. Many homosexuals across history have been known for incredible gifts in writing, public speaking, music, cinema, scientific discoveries, literature and art. (5) Studies have reported that homosexuals exhibit high levels of empathy and compassion compared to heterosexuals. (6)
Because we have suffered and are constantly struggling, we have big hearts that know no boundaries. If we utilize our God-given gifts wisely and for the greater good, we can do wonders inshaAllah.
Of course, there are Muslim homosexuals and pro-gay rights advocates who adopt a completely different perspective. Some try to balance between their religious duties while keeping in line with their orientation; in other words, they carry out their desires yet remain true to their duties. Others denounce Islamic rules altogether arguing that in modern times, such rules do not apply, hence they call for a reformation in Islamic laws taken for granted as solid foundations of religion.
Others are still struggling between balancing Islamic law and their own sexuality, searching for answers that provide them with ultimate satisfaction.
I am in no way trying to prove myself right and others wrong. This article is solely intended to highlight some of the struggles I go through as a Muslim homosexual, and I have taken the liberty at some points to speak on behalf of fellow struggling homosexuals because of our shared tribulations. Whatever your position is on this matter, I respect you and love you as a human being, your desires are legitimate and in no way make you less of a human being.
However, based on my beliefs, I do not accept specific actions that you may do which go against Islamic law. And there again, you are no less of a human being, and I still respect you as an individual. This falls at the heart of Islam – if someone like me who is struggling with his/her own desires can adopt such a stance, then so can everyone else. Maybe if we focus less on demonizing other people and concentrate more on helping one another, things would start to change for the best.
If you are a homosexual reading this, please know that my heart is with you. I of all people understand the daily struggles you are going through, and I salute your bravery and high spirit. Please remember that Allah is Merciful and Forgiving, no matter how much people tell you otherwise. Stay strong, and if you ever fall into the traps of Shaytan (the devil), repent to the Almighty with a pure heart and know that He accepts and welcomes the sincere. Pray to remain steadfast. Fasting is a powerful weapon so try your best to fast regularly.
Also, try to do sports and channel your energy in healthy ways. Surround yourself with the good company of pious people, and keep daily companionship of His Book. Pursue a higher purpose in life, for you are already on a high track. Trust me, I understand that the struggles may reach excruciating levels – it is at those moments that our inner cores are tested.
Make your struggles entirely for His sake, and they will be worth it. You will come out stronger and braver than before. With today’s explosion of sexuality and acceptance of same-sex relations, do not swallow the bait. Keep yourself in the company of Him for that is all that ultimately matters.
If you are a heterosexual reading this and assuming you may be uncomfortable with such a topic, I understand that this may be overwhelming for you at first glance. Take it easy on yourself, and certainly take it easy on others. We all have our own struggles, so let us make this journey we call life a little bit less difficult for one another. Let us shift our focus from pointing out each other’s faults and instead work together for more empathy, compassion and love.
There is a difference between respecting someone and accepting his/her actions; the former must be there at all times. If we disagree or have different lifestyles, and certainly if we make mistakes, please do not judge us. Bear with us. Listen to us, be there for us, for if you ever need us we will be there for you.
Even though we may not get the chance to experience what it means to have a spouse, be intimate or even raise a family in this life, I pray that Allah accepts our struggles for His sake and fulfil our desires in the Hereafter. Yes, I am a gay Muslim, and I am proud – proud that Allah has chosen me and many other brothers and sisters for this particular struggle in this life. And for that, and for all His countless blessings we say, Alhamdulillah.
“I hope that the world turns and that things get better. But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you… I love you. With all my heart, I love you.”
(V for Vendetta)
1. Lee, R. (2000). Health care problems of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender patients. Western Journal of Medicine, 172(6), 403–408.
2. Kesvani, H. (2015, April 18). Meet The Gay Muslims Living In Straight Marriages. http://www.buzzfeed.com/husseinkesvani/gay-muslims-in-straight-marriages
3. Schneeberger, A. R., Dietl, M. F., Muenzenmaier, K. H., Huber, C. G., & Lang, U. E. (2014). Stressful childhood experiences and health outcomes in sexual minority populations: a systematic review. Social psychiatry and psychiatric epidemiology, 49(9), 1427-1445.
4. Qadhi, Y. (2009, April 13). Dealing With Homosexual Urges: Yasir Qadhi to Muslim Student. http://muslimmatters.org/2009/04/13/dealing-with-homosexual-urges/
5. Rictor Norton (compiler), “The Great Queers of History, Part 1: Born before 1800″, 1 May 2004 <http://rictornorton.co.uk/greatgay/greatgay.htm>.
6. Salais, D. A., & Fischer, R. B. (1995). Sexual preference and altruism. Journal of Homosexuality, 28(1-2), 185-196.
This was narrated by Qari Ismail Samni (Allah fill his grave with noor), Bolton.
“Shaykh AbulHassan Nadwi (Allah have mercy upon him) visited the UK and a programme was held for Ulama. At the start of the talk, Shaykh mentioned a dream in which he saw the blessed and glorious vision of the Final Messenger, the Seal of the Prophets ﷺ. In the dream, the Prophet ﷺ mentioned that he had his eyes on the Muslims of England (mere nazar England walo par hein).
On hearing this, the Ulama present were delighted and overjoyed. After which Shaykh stated, ‘There is no need to be so happy! Let me explain… if a mother has two children, one is playing in the garden and the second is playing near the fire. Which child does the mother have her eye on? Obviously, the one near the fire. Similarly, the interpretation of the dream is the Prophet ﷺ has his eyes fixated on the people of England because your Imaan is at risk. You may ask how? The Muslims of Makkah and Madinah will not sell their Imaan, because they are surrounded by Muslims and they are living in a Muslim country. At the most, they will commit sins. Same for the people of Pakistan, they will not sell their Imaan. As for the Muslims for India, they live in a Hindu country but totally oppose the actions of the Hindus. They dress differently, worship differently and keep Masjids and Hindu Temples separate.
What I have seen in the UK, especially in the young generation, step by step and inch by inch they follow the non-Muslims in every way; in their dress; in their food; their hairstyles; and their whole lifestyle. You are surrounded by non-Muslims, it is very easy to sell your Imaan living in the West.'”
Mawlana then continued his bayan.
It is December, the time of the year we see festive decorations and lights all around the country. Christmas is coming soon… Living in a non-Muslim country, how should we participate in this Christian festival? Are we allowed to attend Christmas parties? Should we let our children partake in Santa’s Grotto? When they attend school they want to play a part in the nativity play, is this Halal? Further, on Christmas day should we exchange gifts with our families and our Christian neighbours? Can we prepare a turkey dinner on Christmas day and enjoy it with the family? I won’t answer all these questions, but it is food for thought, further to the dream I mentioned in the start.
I will, however, like to touch on an issue increasing in the UK, having a turkey dinner on Christmas day. It is forbidden for a Muslim to prepare a turkey dinner on Christmas because this is an imitation of non-Muslims. It is confirmed in an authentic narration that “whoever imitates a people is one of them.”
Saying that the family gathers on this day and this is not with the purpose of imitating the non-Muslims but due to the fact that this day is a (bank) holiday, then this does not make it permissible for you to do this, because, in essence, you are imitating them. Gathering on this day could be on any other kind of food, why then have specifically a turkey dinner? Is this not imitating them even in the kind of food they eat?
The prohibition of resembling the non-Muslims is not restricted to inward actions [beliefs, actions of the heart] and intentions, but also to outward actions. It is for this reason that the Prophet ﷺ prohibited us from performing the prayer at sunset and sunrise, and he ﷺ said that it rises between two horns of the devil and the polytheist prostate to it at this time, despite the fact that a Muslim prays to Allah and not to the horns of the devil. However, the Prophet ﷺ forbade us from performing the prayer at that time regardless of our intention.
The Prophet ﷺ also used to differ from the people of the book even in the way they combed their hair.
Indeed, there are many narrations of the Prophet ﷺ about differing from the people of the Book in regard to both words and actions.
Therefore, we advise you to fear Allah and not imitate the polytheists and act in conformity with them in their festivals and traditions which are peculiar to them.
One should explain to the family, that it is permissible for the family to gather on that day because it is a holiday but without making this day as a festival and imitating the non-Muslims in their eating traditions and the like. It should be a family gathering like all other gatherings throughout the year [without any special food, settings or decorations].
Ismail Ibn Nazir Satia (One who is in dire need of Allah’s forgiveness, mercy and pleasure)
29 Rabiul Awwal 1440
1 From the collection of Sahih Muslim
On the authority of `Uqbah bin `Amr, may Allah, exalted be He, be well-pleased with him, who said, “I heard The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty upon him, say while he was delivering a sermon from the pulpit – minbar,
“Prepare to meet them with as much strength as you can afford,
verily, strength lies in archery,
verily, strength lies in archery,
verily, strength lies in archery.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken in Truth
2 From the collection of Sahih Muslim
On the authority of `Uqbah bin `Amr, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said,
“I heard the Holy Prophet, Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him, say
“Lands will be thrown open to you and Allah will suffice you against their evil, but none of you should give up sporting with his arrows, and you shall know.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken in Truth
3 Selected by at-Tabarani
On the authority of Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqas, may Allah’s favour be upon him, who related,
“The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of the Almighty be upon him, said,
“You must use archery, for it is good for him who engages in warfare.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
4 Related by Abu ash-Shaykh and Ibn Abi Dunya
On the authority of Abu Hurayrah, Allah Almighty’s favour be upon him, from The Holy Prophet, may Allah the Exalted bless him and give him peace, who said,
“Learn the throwing of arrows, and do not be averse to it, for the area between the two targets holds a garden of the gardens of paradise.”
and the Messenger has spoken truly
5 Chosen by ad-Daylami in his Musnad
On the authority of Abu Sa’id al-Khudri, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who related that The Holy Prophet, may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said,
“Learn the casting of arrows and the Qur’an.”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
6 Narrated by al-Bayhaqi the Sunan
On the authority of Abu Rafi’, may Allah be pleased with him, who related, “I asked The Holy Prophet, may peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, `Do children have rights over us as we have rights?’ The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, replied,
“Yes, the father has the same legal obligations towards his son as the son towards him.” And he said, “The rights of the son over his parent is that he should teach him writing, swimming, and the casting of arrows and that he should leave him in a good legal inheritance.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
7 Selected by ad-Daylami
On the authority of Jabir, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who narrated, “The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,
“Teach your sons the shooting of arrows!’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
8 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh
On the authority of Abu Qilaba, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who narrated, “The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said,
“Teach your young boys both archery and swimming.’”
9 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh and others
On the authority of al-Qa’qa bin Abi Hidr, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,
“Dress like the Ma’d, adopt rough clothing, wear simple garments, surpass one another in jousting, and walk barefoot.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
10 Abu Da’ud and others
On the authority of `Uqba bin `Amr, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who related, “I heard The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, say,
“Verily, with one arrow Allah almighty will admit three individuals into paradise :
the maker of the arrow who fashions it with good intent,
the archer who shoots this arrow and
the person who gathers it up (after it has been shot).’”
and the Holy Prophet has spoken truly
11 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh
On the authority of Najiya, may Allah’s favour be on him, who related, “With a quiver in my hand, I was passing by an old man sitting by the gate of Bani Sulaym. He spoke to me and said, `Will you sell me the arrows you hold in your hand or not?’ I said, `I will sell it.’ And the old man said, `Verily I shall buy it, though I can no longer shoot it. Then he said to his servant girl,
`Oh slave girl, go check my quiver and tell me whether it is full up or not!
For I heard The Holy Prophet, may Allah send peace and blessings upon him, say,
“Attend to your quivers!’”
12 Related by an-Nasa’i and al-Bayhaqi
On the authority of `Ata ibn Abi Rabah, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who narrated, “I saw Khalid bin Abdullah and Jabir bin `Amru-l-Ansari, may Allah Almighty’s favours be upon them both, casting arrows. As one of them wearied, the other said to his companion, `You have grown weary of casting arrows, but I have heard these words from The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,
“Everything that is done without the remembrance of Allah (Dhikrullah) is vain distraction and idle play, but for these four accomplishments :
a man walking between the two points of the archery ground, training his horse, learning how to swim and jesting with his family.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
13 Reported by al-Qarrab
On the authority of Abu ad-Darda’, may Allah Almighty shower His favours on him, who narrates from The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,
“All games are idle play but three things :
the riding of horses,
the casting of arrows,
and a man playing with his wife ;
And of these the most beloved to me is the casting of arrows.”
14 ad-Daylami
On the authority of Ibn `Umar, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with them both, from The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,
“What an excellent diversion for a man is the casting of arrows; and whoever
leaves archery after having learnt it, he has rejected a gift of grace.”
and the Holy Prophet spoke truly
15 Selected by ad-Daylami
On the authority of `Abd-ur Rahman ibn Shumasa that Qusaym al-Layth said to `Uqba bin `Amr, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, as he was walking back and forth between the two targets (on the archery ground) “How is it that you keep going between these two points, whereas you are already an old man?” To this `Uqba replied, “Were I not for this world that I heard from The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, I would not take this upon myself.” And he said, “I heard him say,
“Whoever learns archery, only to later abandon it, he is not one of us.’”
16 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh
On the authority of Ibn `Umar, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with them both, who narrates that The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, once missed a certain man. The Holy Prophet, upon whom be blessings and peace, said,
“Where is that missing person?
And one of them said, “He has gone gaming.”
And The Holy Prophet, Allah’s peace and Blessings upon him, said,
“What have we to do with games!”
And one man said, “O Prophet of Allah! That man has gone to cast his arrows.”
Thereupon The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,
“The casting of arrows is not one of the unlawful games; indeed, casting arrows is the very best of your pastimes.’”
17 Narrated by Abu ash-Shaykh
On the authority of Abu Hurayra, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who recalled, “The Holy Messenger, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,
“The casting of arrows is a share and a characteristic of the shares of Islam.’”
and the Holy Prophet has spoken truly
18 Reported by Abu ash-Shaykh
On the authority of Abu Umama, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said,
“Men have not drawn anything but that the bow had an advantage over it, and more.”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
19 at-Tabarani
On the authority of Saiyidina Ali, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who relates, “On the morning of Ghadir Khumm The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, wound my turban and its end fell down upon my shoulder. Then he said,
“Verily, the Lord, exalted be His Majesty, assisted me on the day of the battle of Badr and on the day of the battle of Hunayn with angels, and they were with this turban wound in this manner.”
Then the Holy Prophet, may Allah Almighty send peace and blessings upon him, went on to say,
“Truly the turban is a barrier between the Muslims and the idolaters.”
Then he donned his armour and, while holding an Arabian bow in his blessed hand, his eye fell upon a man who had in his hand a Persian bow. The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said to him,
“Put that away from your hand and take this Arabian bow and these spears of metal; Allah in His exalted Majesty will then support your faith and make you firm in faith and establish you in the land.’”
20 Narrated by al-Bayhaqi
On the authority of Jabir bin Abdullah, may Allah be well-pleased with them both, on the authority of The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,
“My love necessarily goes to whoever moves back and forth between the two points (the shooting place and the target of the archery field) with an Arabian bow, not with the bow of Chosroes (Persian kings).”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
21 Related by at-Tabarani
On the authority of Abi Darda’, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, on the authority of The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,
“Everyone who walks between the two points of the archery field will have
merited the reward for a good deed for every step he takes.”
and the Holy Prophet has spoken truly
22 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh and ad-Daylami
On the authority of Abi Darda’, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, on the authority of The Holy Prophet, may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him, who said,
“Whoever removes his wrap from his shoulders and walks between the two targets of the archery field, will receive the reward for the freeing of a believing slave for every single step.”
and the Holy Prophet has spoken truly
23 Selected by Ibn Abi ad-Dunya
On the authority of Abdullah bin Jarad, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said,
“The Holy Prophet, may Allah bless him and give him peace, liked shooting arrows between the two targets, and he used to run along with his Companions.”
24 Selected by ash-Shaykh
On the authority of Anas bin Malik, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “I saw The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, chewing a bowstring of sinew, and he firmly spliced the end of his bow with it while he was fasting on a day of Ramadan.”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
25 Selected by an-Nasa’i
On the authority of Ka’b bin Murra, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “I heard The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, say,
“Shoot! He whose arrows reaches the enemy, provided his arrow is shot in the way of Allah, Allah will raise him one level in paradise.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
26 Selected by at-Tabarani
On the authority of Anas, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said,
“Whoever shoots an arrow in the way of Allah, will receive the reward of freeing a slave; and this is his ransom from the fire.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
27 Selected by at-Tabarani in his book `Al-Awsat’
On the authority of Anas, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,
“He who shoots an arrow in the way of Allah, whether it falls short or reaches its target, his reward for his arrow shall be as the reward for the freeing of four people of the sons of Isma’il, had he freed them.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
28 Selected by at-Tabarani in his book `al-Kabir’
On the authority of Muhammad Ibn-ul-Hanafiya, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said,
“I saw Abu `Amru-al-Ansari, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, on the day of Siffin, and he had taken the pledge of allegiance at `Aqaba and fought in the Battles of Badr and Uhud ; now he was bent over from fasting and he said to his servant boy, “Give me cover with the shield!” and the servant boy gave him cover so that he was thereby protected from his enemy whilst he drew the bowstring, weakly until he was hit by three arrows, shooting which he did not return. Thereupon he said, “I heard the Messenger of Allah, may Allah’s blessings and peace be upon him, say,
“If a person shoots an arrow for the sake of Allah and His good pleasure, regardless of whether his arrow reaches or falls short of his enemy, that shot will be a light going ahead of him on the Day of Resurrection.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
29 Related by al-Bukhari
On the authority of Abu Usayd as-Sa’idi, may Allah be well-pleased with him, on the authority of his father, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,
“On the days of Badr and Hunayn, we joined ranks against the Quraysh and they have joined ranks against us; should they subdue you, go for your arrows.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
30 Selected by at-Tabarani
On the authority of Hussein Ibn as-Sa’ib Ibn Abi Lubaba, on the authority of his father, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “It was the eve of `Aqaba or the eve of the Battle of Badr when The Holy Prophet, on whom be blessings and peace of Allah Almighty, spoke to those of the Ansar and the Muhajirin who were with him,
“How will you fight the unbelievers on the morrow?”
And `Asim Ibn Abi-al-Aflah said in answer to this, “O Messenger of Allah, first of all, we shall take up the bow and arrows; and if they have drawn close to us, up to two hundred cubits or around that distance, the shooting of a variety of bows begins ; and when they have drawn even closer, the shattering with stones, and when they have drawn yet closer within the reach of our lances, the play of lances begins until the lances are broken ; after that comes the contest of the swords, and this is the manner of battle, O Messenger of Allah.” Upon this The Holy Prophet, upon whom peace, said,
“Thus war is revealed to the people of faith.”
then he gave the command for it and said,
“He who engages in battle with the enemy, let him fight in the manner of Asim.”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
31 Upon which all (Traditions) are agreed
On the authority of Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqas, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said,
“The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, supplied me with arrows on the day of Uhud and The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said to me,
“Shoot, oh Sa’ad, may my father and mother be your ransom!”
also on this authority, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, he said, “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, did not join both his parents (in this turn of phrase) for anyone else before me, and I was the first to cast arrows at the unbelievers.”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
32 Related by Abu ash-Shaykh and al-Hakim
On the authority of Sa`d ibn Abi Waqqas, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said to me also on the day of Uhud,
“Oh Allah, guide his shot and grant his supplication”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
33 Chosen by al-Bukhari
On the authority of Salama bin al-Akwa’, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, that The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, stepped out to the people of Bani Aslam, while they were staging an archery competition in the marketplace, and he said to them,
“Shoot, ye sons of Isma’il! For verily, your forefather was an archer; and I am with the tribe of so-and-so.”
Thereupon they hesitated, and The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, asked,
“What is it with you?”
and they said, “How shall we shoot while you are with the tribe of so-and-so?” and The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said,
“Go ahead, and shoot, for I am with all of you.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
34 Narrated by at-Tirmidhi
On the authority of Abu Hurayra, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah be upon him, spoke,
“No wager is permitted except with animals having soles (khuf or hooves – hafir) or with the casting of arrows (nasl).’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
35 Chosen by Abu ash-Shaykh
On the authority of Anas, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, said,
“Whoever acquires a bow in the way of Allah, from him Allah the exalted fends off poverty and need through its blessings.”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
36 Selected by at-Tabarani in his book `As-Saghir’
On the authority of A’isha, may Allah be well-pleased with her, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,
“There is no harm for any of you to take up your bow when you are overtaken by care, and thereby do away with your worries.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
37 Chosen by Abu ash-Shaykh
On the authority of Abu Khirash, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “I heard al-Qasim relate about The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, that he passed by some people shooting arrows with bows, and one of the Companions said, “I see that they have not yet prayed their obligatory prayers, which would be better than what they are doing,
O Messenger of Allah.” And the holy prophet, Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, then said,
“Their bows are better unless they miss the prayer time.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
38 Chosen by Abu ash-Shaykh
On the authority of Ibn `Umar, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with them both, who relates,
“The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, spoke,
“The angels witness three things:
the wager of the horse-race,
the shooting with the bow,
and the pleasantry of a man with his wife.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
39 Chosen by at-Tabarani
On the authority of Rafi` bin Khadij, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who related, that he went out on the day of Uhud, and The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, wished him to return to Medina, for he thought him to be too young. But his uncle told The Holy Prophet, that Rafi’ was an archer and a teacher of archery, whereupon The Holy Prophet, on whom be blessings and peace from Allah Almighty, permitted him to come along.
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
40 On the authority of Salama bin al-Akwa’, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who related, “I asked The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, about the permissibility of praying with the bow and the leather quiver: was this permissible or not?” The Holy Prophet, may Allah Almighty bless him and send him peace, replied,
“Pray with the bow but leave aside the leather quiver.’”
and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly
“All of my Ummah will be forgiven except those who sin openly…” [1]
Sinning privately is between Allah and His servant and a struggle that only He knows about and which In sha Allah He will give His servant the Tawfiq to repent for. Openly sinning with no remorse is tantamount to a public challenge to Allah and it doesn’t just remain between a servant and his Lord, but with the people too. One is to unashamedly disobey Allah and then to further justify the sin, but “Allah will not help a people until they help themselves.” [2]
Lately, I seem to have come across many sisters who give reasons for their Hijab – or lack thereof!
“I’m not ready for the Hijab yet!”
“So what if my hair is uncovered? My heart is clean!”
“Don’t tell me to wear Hijab, only Allah can judge me.”
Naturally, it led to many debates where not everyone agreed. Hence, this is merely an opinion.
At random, I started looking at other commandments of Allah. His order to fulfil the obligation of Salah comes with the condition that one has reached the age of puberty, is sane, and is a Muslim. Similarly, the donning of Hijab becomes compulsory once a woman reaches the age of puberty. But why are sisters so quick to make excuses like, “I’m not ready yet” and, “But my heart is clean,” when we don’t make the same excuses for our Zakah and fasting the month of Ramadhan?
My mind is at awe with the women around my Nabi ﷺ who dropped all they had in order to comply to another commandment of Allah with the hope of coming closer to Him. Fatimah Al-Zahrah (R), the queen of the women of Jannah, was the epitome of modesty at the time of Nabi ﷺ and continues to serve as an example until the end of time. Similarly, Umm Khallad (R) who upon hearing of the martyrdom of her beloved son on the battlefield, rushed to it whilst veiled. When asked how she managed to cover in such a state, she responded, “I have lost my son, but I have not lost my modesty.” [3]
Such women had the purest of hearts and yet they did not make the excuses we make because it is not befitting for a Muslim woman to ask for a concession in a matter that Allah and His Nabi (S) have ordained for us!
It may be true that a sister without the Hijab may have a heart purer and Taqwa stronger than that of a sister fully covered. However, when a Muslim woman CHOOSES not to wear the Hijab out of her own free-will (without a valid Shar’i reason), she becomes another fallen brick in the wall that divides us as an Ummah because she has chosen to hide her identity. Those who wear the Hijab (despite their struggles) are then labelled fanatics and extremists because another side has presented a “liberal” image which shows the world that it clearly isn’t mandatory to wear the Hijab and it can’t really be part of the faith! And so in this manner, she makes it harder for her “Hijabi” sister to practice her faith.
Those who refuse the Hijab claiming only Allah can judge them, remember that indeed Allah WILL judge them. Let’s help one another to become stronger in our faith and show the world that we are proud of our identity. May Allah help each of us in our struggles and only He knows what they are.
Do you agree? Disagree? All comments welcome, but please be courteous.
[1] Bukhari and Muslim
[2] Surah Ra’ad (13:11)
[3] Abu Dawud
Zainab Bint Husain (Allah protect her)
10 Muharram 1440
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Is every child born a Muslim?
Abu Hurayrah (Allah be pleased with him) narrates, the Prophet (Allah’s peace and blessing be upon him) said, ‘Every child is born in a state of fitrah, and then his parents make him into a Jew, a Christian or a Magian.’ (Bukhari & Muslim).
The Hadith does NOT say every child is born a “Muslim.” The word fitrah can be translated as ‘natural disposition’ or ‘natural instinct’; upon this understanding one can take fitrah to be in some sense a kind of innate characteristic. This Hadith is commonly misunderstood, it does not mean every child is born a Muslim. What it actually means is, every child is born upon nature. And the natural state of every human being is one of clarity, purity, of being in a pristine form, of being unpolluted and unadulterated by external factors. That natural state is conducive to a person accepting Islam and inclines one towards the beauty of Islam. But not exactly makes him a Muslim. As that child grows up those external factors influence him. If the external factor is corrosive and corrupting, they will becomes disinclined towards Islam. But they will not made apostates in childhood. The full Hadith narrated by Imam Bukahri, Imam Malik, Imam Muslim and Imam Ibn Hibban continues… The Prophet asked the Sahabah, “Do you see any animal mutilated when it is born?” Then the Sahabah asked, “What if that child died in his infancy?” The Prophet replied, “When Allah created them Allah knew best what they were going to do.” *End of the Hadith.*
If every child was born a Muslim, there would have been no need for the Sahabah to ask that question: “What if that child died in his infancy?” As all babies are born Muslim – but this is incorrect. We abstain from commenting on the children of the Christians, Jews, and polytheists who die in infancy.
If every child WAS born a Muslim, we could use the term “revert” when they revert back to Islam. But every child is born upon Fitrah, which means they are ‘inclined’ towards Islam, BUT NOT BORN MUSLIM as many assume. Had they all been born Muslim, this would mean they left Islam i.e. became Murtad (apostate) and then returned back to Islam. My question is when did they become Murtad? The answer is never. Hence it is wrong to use the term “revert.”
So every child is not born a Muslim, please see video for further misunderstood verses by Shaykh Riyadh Haq:
Please click here
Also, https://www.islam21c.com/theology/am-i-a-convert-or-a-revert/
حَدَّثَنَا الْقَعْنَبِيُّ، عَنْ مَالِكٍ، عَنْ أَبِي الزِّنَادِ، عَنِ الأَعْرَجِ، عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم ” كُلُّ مَوْلُودٍ يُولَدُ عَلَى الْفِطْرَةِ فَأَبَوَاهُ يُهَوِّدَانِهِ وَيُنَصِّرَانِهِ كَمَا تَنَاتَجُ الإِبِلُ مِنْ بَهِيمَةٍ جَمْعَاءَ هَلْ تُحِسُّ مِنْ جَدْعَاءَ ” . قَالُوا يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ أَفَرَأَيْتَ مَنْ يَمُوتُ وَهُوَ صَغِيرٌ قَالَ ” اللَّهُ أَعْلَمُ بِمَا كَانُوا عَامِلِينَ ”
Abu Hurairah reported the Messenger of Allah (May peace be upon him) as saying :
Every child is born on Islam, but his parents make him a Jew and a Christian, just as a beast is born whole. Do you find some among them (born) maimed? The people asked : Messenger of Allah! What do you think about the one who died while he was young? He replied : Allah knows best what he was going to do. (Abu Dawood)
Ismail Ibn Nazir Satia (one who is in dire need of Allah’s forgiveness, mercy and pleasure)
8 Rajab 1439