Written by Sadiq bin Mas’uud
Music playing in the background. Six hundred eager people conversing and anticipating the arrival of the bride.
Enter the bride.
A dazzling young beauty, laden with only the finest and softest materials enters the hall. Glittery ornaments sparkling in her hair and diamond earrings hanging low, result in some favourable murmurs and nods of approval amongst the women and leaves others baffled at how she managed to grow double her hair length overnight. She smiles, walks down the aisle, and approaches her husband who carefully hands her an exquisite bouquet of the choicest flowers and takes her seat next to him on centre stage. She holds her head and shoulders as a proper bride should—high and elegant. Some start making their way to the front for family photos, handing over gifts, and congratulating the newlyweds. The slideshow on the wall project family photos over the years and the live DJs engage the audience with some heartwarming tunes to get the mood rolling.
Amidst the clattering of forks and knives enjoying the five-course meal, eyes focus on the young lady who has taken the mike on stage. The bride’s sister says thanks the guests for attending, despite the big derby game, City vs. United, drawing some laughs in the audience, especially amongst the brothers. She says a few words to embarrass the bride, wishes her well on her life ahead and jokingly threatens the groom to make sure he takes care of her (not-so) little sister. She proceeds by adding,
“We pray Allah makes her a wife like Fatimah (R) and him a husband like Ali (R). May they live the lives of the Sahabahs before us and follow in the footsteps of Nabi ﷺ …”
I tuned out, too busy looking around me. Everyone clapped and happily resumed their meals.
Exeunt. Curtains fall.
Was I the only one who found her speech a little pretentious? Ameen to the beautiful Du’aas and Allah is the sole judge of our hearts, but to make a mockery of the Sunnah like that? I was offended. Couples want to court before marriage; they want to choose a best man for their wedding; brothers want the best cars to take their new bride home; sisters demand a mind-blowing Mahr and want a henna ceremony dancing to Bollywood tunes, an over-night hen party (the list goes on and on and on) and then they expect a marriage like the queen of the women of Jannah? We have functions of rife as a public challenge to Allah, inviting his wrath and then expect His Mercy and blessings in it as if we have a right to it? The audacity! My beloved Nabi’s ﷺ life and his families’ lives aren’t there to flower our events and to tick the box for the more “religious” in the crowd; or to balance all the wrongs in the event by adding a few Islamic lines; or to appease our guilt in carrying out such an event. The life of Nabi ﷺ and the lives of the Sahabah (R) and Sahabiyaat (R) are there as examples for you and I to emulate in EVERY aspect of our lives including marriage. A marriage is a sacred union between two people, and it is our duty to keep it sacred. My beloved Nabi ﷺ said,
اعظم النكاح ايسرها مؤنة
“The most blessed Nikah is the one with the least expenditure.” 
When my Nabi ﷺ asked his soon to be son-in-law Ali (R) what he had as Mahr to present to his daughter Fatimah (R), he replied that he only owned a sword, an armour, and a horse.  He sold his armour for four hundred and eighty dirhams which was then presented as a very simple dowry to Fatimah (R). For the wedding feast, Sa’d bin Ubadah (R) offered a sheep and some Ansar offered some corn.  The simplicity and ease of their weddings was what put so much Barakah and happiness in their marriages. Nabi ﷺ instructed,
“Hold a wedding feast, even if only with a sheep.” 
Nabi ﷺ himself, gave simple wedding feasts to mark his marriages. Safiyya Bint Shaibah (R) narrates, “The Prophet ﷺ gave a banquet of two Mudds (3.5 kg) of barley on marrying some of his wives.” 
To consummate his ﷺ’s marriage with Safiyyah Bint Huyay (R), Anas (R) narrates, “The Prophet ﷺ ordered for the leather dining sheets to be spread, and then dates, dried yoghurt and butter were provided over it, and that was the Walimah of the Prophet.”  If we tried to emulate these Sunnahs of our beloved Nabi ﷺ in our weddings, then we’d see them naturally turn into beautiful marriages In sha Allah!
 Bayhaqi in his Shu’ab al-Iman & Mishkat al-Masabih
 Kifayat at-Taalib, Bihar al-Anwaar
 Kanzul Umaal
 Sahih Bukhari
 Sahih Bukhari
 Sahih Bukhari
Zainab Bint Husain
The purpose of this post is to attract the parents’ attention to the effects of TV violence on children and to spread knowledge among them in order to help lessen the problems that children might have as a consequence of seeing such violence.
It’s obvious that parents are always concerned with the well-being of their children and try their best to provide them with the utmost suitable environment for their growth and development. That’s what parents are responsible for in front of Allah (swt), because they’ll be asked about their upbringing, nurturing, and education. Nonetheless, parents frequently lose control over their children’s safe atmosphere, specially in the presence of all this technology nowadays.
Threats are Everywhere
With all the threats that surround us today, children are the most vulnerable. That’s due to the fact that they still don’t have the mental abilities to analyze the data and input that their brain receives whenever they encounter new things. For this reason, parents are there to help them figure stuff out and guide them to what’s right. However, if parent’s aren’t careful enough, they might be causing their children to unsafely get exposed to inevitable threats they are better off without.
Children have Sensitive Personalities
Like we’re saying, children are known for their unstable personality; they are affected by everything that happens around them. And in the light of all that’s happening around the world, almost everyone is trying to keep up to date with the world’s news, that includes parents who have children. One of the things these parents are not aware of when they are watching news programs, is that their children are likely to be around watching as well. On the other hand, some parents are also interested in watching action and horror movies, and their inattention may end up letting the children watch these kinds of movies with or without them. These programs, whether the news or inappropriate movies, might show content that children are not supposed to see but, if they do, will affect them either by arousing their curiosity to imitate anything they observe, or by making them frightened by what they see.
Imitation is one of the characteristics of childhood. Children tend to imitate everyone and everything new they see, even if it is wrong. That is why we see girls imitating their mothers by pretending to cook or by wearing their high heels, and boys imitating their fathers as well. So, when children sit next to their parents while they are watching TV, their attention will obviously be grabbed by certain scenes that show violence, and knowing that children have to examine everything before they become familiar with it, they might decide to try the violence scene without realizing what the consequences could be. For example, when the news programs present certain crimes or murders that happened, the child might copy what he sees, he might hurt himself or anyone else. Therefore, most of the time, such imitations lead to drastic results, because the child is unable to differentiate between what’s right or wrong, what is harmful or not, and what is good or evil.
Moreover, children might get very scared and terrified when they see this violence. For instance, when a child watches how wars are happening and how planes and cannons are destroying many homes and killing many people, he will be horrified by what he sees, and eventually these things will be printed in his mind and will be part of his personality later on. In addition, many children cannot sleep and have nightmares when they observe violence and scary stuff. Hence, they will give their parents a hard time at night. Also, children have a wide imagination that will make them, apparently, see things in the dark because of the stored violent images, like imagining that someone is coming to kill them or that a thief is robbing the house. As a result the child might turn out to be a coward, have a weak personality, and maybe have some mental problems.
Childhood is Delicate, Be Alert
We should admit that childhood is a very delicate stage of life, that is why a child’s life should be full of happy, fun and enjoyable things, and clear of everything that is violent and scary. So, to every parent who cares about his children’s life and personality: keep your kids away from news programs and unsuitable movies, and make sure that they enjoy every part of this stage because it is the foundation of everyone’s life.
Don’t Forget About Adolescence
Just as childhood is very important, adolescence is likewise critical and care-demanding. That’s why you shouldn’t leave adolescents grow in cyberspace, as it poses similar threats on them like any other technology these days. You should also encourage them to improve their academic achievements by acquiring the good habit of taking notes. This could boost their academic performances for sure and they would be actively learning instead of just passively depending on the internet to get their homework done. It’s also very effective to try to help them stay motivated even when they don’t feel like it because it will have a positive impact on their everyday attitude.
Your Responsibility as a Parent
As parents, you have a great deal of responsibilities toward your children. You owe it to your children to keep them protected and comfortable. Allah (swt) says in Surah At-Tahrim, Verse 6:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا قُوا أَنفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًا وَقُودُهَا النَّاسُ وَالْحِجَارَةُ عَلَيْهَا مَلَائِكَةٌ غِلَاظٌ شِدَادٌ لَّا يَعْصُونَ اللَّهَ مَا أَمَرَهُمْ وَيَفْعَلُونَ مَا يُؤْمَرُونَ
O, Believers Save yourselves and your dependents from the fire whose fuel are humans and the stones.
So, when a child of yours starts to adopt a certain way of life, it’ll either be a virtuous alteration that will change him into a good human being or a wicked alteration that will change him into a degraded individual. And whatever he turns into is fairly reliant on the upbringing he receives from you. The obligation you have in raising your children is highly essential. That’s why the greatest favor you could do for your children is show them how to be good, well-mannered, faithful, friendly, righteous, generous, just, wise, hard-working muslims, and demonstrate to them that their reference in life is the Qur’an and Sunnah because it’ll teach them everything they need to know in order to live a peaceful and honorable life.
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