10 Ways to be the Ideal Muslim Husband

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

images (3)Zainab bint Younus, Canada

MARITAL ADVICE LISTS are common to find in Muslim literature and lectures, yet the information is almost always targeted towards women. However, we all know that it takes two to tango – and so here is a list aimed at Muslim husbands in the hopes that they, too, will benefit and be able to improve their relationships.

1. Have taqwa and isân

Know that you are responsible for your end of the marriage, regardless of how the other party treats you. Fulfill your wife’s rights without demanding yours first, and know that you seek Allah’s Pleasure over anyone else’s. Do your job with excellence, and don’t make it conditional. Isân is not merely to worship in the ritual sense, but to conduct oneself in general with an awareness that Allah is Al-Raqîb (the Ever-Watchful), and to fulfill one’s duties in the best of manners.

Then he (Jibrîl) said, “Inform me about isân.” He (the Messenger of Allah) answered, “It is that you should serve Allah as though you could see Him, for though you cannot see Him yet (know that) He sees you.” (Muslim)

2. Respect her

Remember that Allah describes marriage as a bond of love and mercy – love ebbs and flows, but mercy and respect must always be there, even – especially – in times of conflict. Unfortunately, we tend to present respect as a quality that men need (“men need respect, women need affection”). The truth is, however, that one can love someone without respecting them… and this is very, very dangerous. To have mercy and respect one’s wife is to never assume that she exists merely as an extension of you or to serve your needs. To respect her is to honor her, to defend her from harm and others’ accusations, and to have husn al-ann of her.

In cases of disagreement, this respect translates as not forcing your own opinion upon her when there is Islamically acceptable room for differences of opinion.

It should go without saying, but unfortunately it bears repeating nonetheless – respecting your wife means never, ever, abusing her, physically or otherwise.

“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.”  [Sûrat Al-Rûm, 30:21]

Even in times of conflict, Allah tells us to behave in the most respectful and gracious of manners:

And do not forget graciousness between you.  [Sûrat Al-Baqarah, 2:237]

Abû Mûsa Al-Ashʿari (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:

I asked the Messenger of Allah: “Who is the most excellent among the Muslims?” He said, “One from whose tongue and hands the other Muslims are secure.”  [1]

3.  Be emotionally intelligent

Empathy, being attuned to the other person’s preferences, learning to understand their personality and responding appropriately without expecting to change them into something they’re not… supporting and respecting each other as both individuals and as a team. The Prophet ﷺ was an emotionally intelligent husband, who knew the differences in his wives’ personalities and interacted with them in a manner best suited to each woman. He comforted Ṣufiyyah when she wept; he had spirited discussions with ʿÂishah (May Allah be pleased with her) and he encouraged Ḥafṣah’s (May Allah be pleased with her) for knowledge.

In a famous narration known as the Hadith of Abu Zarʿ(May Allah be pleased with him) [2]  ʿAishah told the Prophet ﷺ the story of eleven women who sat together and described their husbands’ qualities and behaviours. The eleventh woman, Umm Zarʿ, described Abû Zarʿas a man who was extremely generous to his wife, showering her with gifts; who went out of his way to please her; who never rebuked her or verbally abused her; who made sure that she was comfortable and satisfied. To Umm Zarʿ, there was no greater husband than Abû Zarʿ- and the Prophet ﷺ himself told ʿÂishah, I am to you as Abû Zarʿwas to Umm Zarʿ, except that I will never divorce you.

4.  Be a True Qawwâm

Know that being a qawwâm is a matter of being a good leader – not authoritarian or a dictator, but someone who inspires love and respect, who treats others with dignity and respect… The popular book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is a great resource for understanding what good leadership is. There are several excellent Islamic resources discussing leadership lessons from the life of the Prophet ﷺ.  [3]  [4]   Strive to embody the Sunnah in your character, not just in how many rakʿahs a day you pray.

ʿÂishah RA described the Prophet thus: “His character was the Quran.” [5] Be the type of husband that a wife describes in such a manner.

Remember that as a qawwâm, you are responsible and accountable for the well-being of your household and those under your care.

The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:

“Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The amîr (ruler) who is over the people is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock; a man is a shepherd in charge of the inhabitants of his household and he is responsible for his flock…”  [6]

5.  Be friends before you become spouses

That might sound odd (or not) – but we often put so much pressure on ourselves to fulfill a role (husband/wife), that we forget to get to know each other as friends first. Every marriage will go through ups and downs, intimately and otherwise… and you’ll be surprised to realize how much having a solid, sincere friendship can pull you through the hard times.

One example of RasûlAllah’s “friendship” with his wives is his relationship with Sawdah bint Zamʿah RA. She was the first woman whom he married after the death of Khadijah, and although she was considered to be elderly and not as beautiful as the other women whom he would later marry, their relationship was one of camaraderie, confidence, and laughter.  [7]

6.  Don’t be embarrassed or ignorant of female biology

Learn about it – from menstruation to female sexuality to pregnancy and everything else. You need to know this stuff – it will impact your life significantly, intimately and otherwise. Don’t laugh it off or act as though it’s not worth your time and attention. Women’s health is sorely misunderstood, and having a disinterested (or worse, disgusted) husband can make things even more difficult for women.

The Prophet ﷺ did not shy away from these matters, either as a husband or as a Messenger of Allah. Instead, he constantly enjoined men to be aware of and sensitive to their wives’ needs – just as he was with his wives.

Narrated Umm Salamah RA:

While I was laying with the Prophet ﷺ under a single woolen sheet, I got the menses. I slipped away and put on the clothes for menses. He said, “Have you got “nifâs” (menses)?” I replied, “Yes.” He then called me and made me lie with him under the same sheet.   [8]

7.  Be responsible

Being “a good Muslim husband” doesn’t just mean fulfilling the basic rights as a husband and leaving it at that. Being a good Muslim husband means that you are on the ball as a responsible adult – whether it’s paying the bills, taking out the trash, cleaning a mess in the house, or being an engaged father (not ‘babysitting’). Doing these things is not a “kindness to the wife,” or “helping out at home.” It’s not “extra credit” and deserving of lavish praise. It is part and parcel of being a grown man responsible for his surroundings, his family, and himself. Do these things out of mindfulness that Allah will never waste your efforts for His Sake.

Narrated Al-Aswad RA:

I asked ʿÂishah what did the Prophet use to do at home. She replied. “He used to keep himself busy serving his family and when it was time for the prayer, he would get up for prayer.” (Bukhâri)

ʿÂishah RA reported:

I was asked, “What did the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, do in his house?” I said, “The Prophet was a man among men. He would remove fleas from his clothes, milk his sheep, and serve himself.” (Musnad Ahmad 25662)

8.  Don’t pursue your nawâfil at the expense of your wife’s farâi

One issue that many men fall into is that in their zeal to engage more in ʿibâda, they end up burdening their wives even more – to the extent that she is barely able to pray her five alawât with khushûʿ. Both spouses should encourage and facilitate opportunities for each other to strengthen as Muslims, but mothers of young children especially need their husbands to step up so that they can have the necessary time they need to reconnect with Allah and flourish spiritually. (And no, that doesn’t just mean five minutes here and there.)

Ramadan is a time when this becomes more obvious than ever – for example, many men will go to alat Al-arâwî while leaving their wives to deal with the children, in addition to having cooked ifâr beforehand. On a daily basis, though, go out of your way to facilitate your wife’s ʿibâda and spiritual connection.

Narrated Abû Juḥaifah RA:

The Prophet ﷺ made a bond of brotherhood between Salmân Al-Fârisi RA and Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA. Salmân RA paid a visit to Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA and found Umm Al-Dardâ’ RA dressed in shabby clothes and asked her why she was in that state. She replied, “Your brother Abû Al-Dardâ’ R is not interested in (the luxuries of) this world.”

In the meantime Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA came and prepared a meal for Salmân RA. Salmân RA requested Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA to eat (with him), but Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA said, “I am fasting.” Salmân RA said, “I am not going to eat unless you eat.”

So, Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA ate (with Salmân). When it was night and (a part of the night had passed), Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA got up (to offer the night prayer), but Salmân RA told him to sleep and Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA slept.

After sometime Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA again got up but Salmân RA told him to sleep. When it was the last hours of the night, Salmân RA told him to get up then, and both of them offered the prayer.

Salmân RA told Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA, “Your Lord has a right on you, your soul has a right on you, and your family has a right on you; so you should give the rights of all those who has a right on you.”

Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA came to the Prophet ﷺ and narrated the whole story. The Prophet ﷺ said, “Salmân RA has spoken the truth.”   [9]

9.  Learn conflict resolution skills

One big reason that couples end up going to Shuyûkh for counseling is because they simply haven’t learned how to communicate and resolve conflicts in a healthy manner. It’s not even about one specific issue or another; it’s about learning how to deal with whatever issues arise, in the most respectful and appropriate manner possible.  [10]

The Quran and Sunnah urge positive reconciliation between believers, and especially between husbands and wives.

“And live with them honourably. For if you dislike them – perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.” [Sûrat Al-Nisâ’, 4:19]

“And if a woman fears from her husband contempt or evasion, there is no sin upon them if they make terms of settlement between them – and settlement is best. And present in [human] souls is stinginess. But if you do good and fear Allah – then indeed Allah is ever with what you do, Acquainted.” [Sûrat Al-Nisâ’, 4:128]

10. Love your wife for who she is

Not because she’s the person who cooks for you or does your laundry. Not because she’s the mother of your child(ren). Not because you’ve settled into routine and you feel comfortable having her around and she knows how to work the coffee maker and where the family’s paperwork is filed. Love her for her. Her personality traits, her talents, her hobbies, the things about her that make her unique.

Notice them, appreciate them, compliment them. Let her know that you don’t just see her as wife or mother, but as an individual on her own. Know that long before she married you, indeed long before she was born to her own parents, she was created as a separate soul – a human being whose primary identity is as a slave of Allah.

And most importantly – let her know that you love her, with all the pride and openness that RasûlAllah ﷺ demonstrated when he was asked, “Who do you love most?” and he responded, simply and beautifully, “ʿÂishah.”   [11]

There are of course numerous other pieces of advice that can be dispensed on the topic – everything from giving gifts to resolving in-law issues to arranging date-nights and so on. However, more important than specific behaviours are the principles behind them – and it these principles which have been highlighted.

In short, Muslim men should strive to match the standards set by RasûlAllah ﷺ when he said:

“The best of you are those who are the best to their wives, and I am the best of you to my wives.”   [12]

————————–

[1] http://sunnah.com/riyadussaliheen/18/2

[2] http://sunnah.com/bukhari/67/123

[3] http://muslimmatters.org/2014/10/28/lessons-in-leadership-from-the-prophet-muhammad-saw/ and http://muslimmatters.org/2014/11/04/21-lessons-in-leadership-from-the-prophet-part-2/

[4] https://theislamicworkplace.com/2006/11/15/the-leadership-process-of-muhammad-s-from-hadith/

[5] http://sunnah.com/urn/2203080

[6] http://sunnah.com/abudawud/20/1

[7] http://thesalafifeminist.blogspot.ca/2014/08/his-laughter-her-love.html

[8] http://sunnah.com/bukhari/6/5

[9] http://sahaba.net/salman-farisi-rights/

[10] https://aljumuah.com/cooling-the-fires-of-marriage-part-1-an-approach-to-conflict-resolution/

[11] http://sunnah.com/bukhari/64/384

[12] Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi, 3895; Ibn Mâjah, 1977; classed as saî by al-Albaani in Saî al-Tirmidhi

ZAINAB BINT YOUNUS

Zainab bint Younus is a Canadian Muslimah who has been active in grassroots da’wah and writing about Islam and the Ummah for the last nine years. She was first published in al-Ameen Newspaper (Vancouver, Canada) at the age of 14, became a co-founder, editor, and writer for MuslimMatters.org at 16; and began writing regularly for SISTERS Magazine at the age of 19 until today. She also blogs regularly at The Salafi Feminist
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I am a Mustish?!

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

britishI am a Muslim. I am British.
I am British. I am a Muslim.
I am a British Muslim.
Do the order of words REALLY matter?
Muslim British, British Muslim.
A cup of tea is what I crave,
Digestives and Custard Creams are my fave.
At the same time, the headscarf I wear,
And YouTube I scour to fashion it with care.
Awkward weather conversations and polite queuing,
HP sauce, marmite and cows mooing.
At the same time, I rush out to perform my prayer,
Because for me, this makes my daily endeavours clear.
You tell me I must choose,
But neither I am willing to lose.
For both are a part of me,
So please, allow me to be.
I am a Muslim. I am British.
I am British. I am a Muslim.
I am a British Muslim.
Do the order of words REALLY matter?
Muslim British, British Muslim.
Mus-tish?
Written by Apa Fatima Ahmed, Teacher at Islamiyah School, (Masjid Sajedeen Open Day 2018).
mustish

Consequences of Withholding Zakāh

By Hadrat Mawlānā Muhammad Saleem Dhorat hafizahullāh

 Zakāh is one of the five fundamentals of Islām. The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallamsaid:

“Islam is founded on five pillars: bearing witness that there is no deity except Allāh, and that Muhammad is His Servant and Messenger; establishment of salāh; paying zakāh; performance of hajj; and fasting the month of Ramadān.” (Al-Bukhārī)

After Īmān, salāh is the most important act of worship which is to be performed physically, and zakāh is the main act of worship which is to be performed monetarily.Salāh and zakāh have been mentioned together on many instances in the Glorious Qur’ān, to cite just some examples, Allāh ta‘ālā says:

“And establish regular salāh and pay regular zakāh, and bow down with those who bow down.” (2:43)

“In fact, the mosques of Allāh are built only by those who believe in Allāh and the Last Day, and those who establish salāh and pay zakāh and who fear none but Allāh. So, it is hoped that they are to be among those on the right path.” (9:18)

Such verses of the Qur’ān substantiate that zakāh is the most important fundamental after salāh. Those who fulfil this duty have been promised abundant reward in this world and the Hereafter; and those who evade zakāh have been sternly warned in the Qur’ān and ahādīth of the consequences.

Benefits of Giving Zakāh

The following are some of the many benefits mentioned in the Qur’ān and ahādīth for the one who gives zakāh:

1.      Pleasure of Allāh ta‘ālā.

2.      Increase in wealth.

3.      Protection from losses.

4.      Forgiveness and blessing from Allāh ta‘ālā.

5.      Safety from calamities.

6.      Protection from the Wrath of Allāh ta‘ālā and from a bad death.

7.      Shelter on the Day of Judgement.

8.      Security from seventy misfortunes.

9.      Safety from the fire of Jahannam.

10.    Safety from grief.

Consequences of Not Paying Zakāh in this World

When Allāh ta‘ālā sends a calamity to punish people for their sins, no power on earth can prevent the onslaught. Men may form thousands of plans, but something decreed by the Lord of the universe must come to pass. Nowadays, the calamities of famine, flood, etc. have become a great problem for the whole world. If we wish to seek relief from such sufferings and cure the malady, we shall have to follow the remedy revealed to us by Allāh ta‘ālā. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has warned us over fourteen hundred years ago, against all those evil practices which bring calamities and afflictions in this world.

These warnings were given long ago and now the world has witnessed their truth through experience. Today, the predictions are coming true. If only people had acted according to the rulings prescribed by Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam, who was undoubtedly the wisest of all wise men. It is beyond the scope of this article to discuss how specific evils cause specific afflictions, but I will bring to the attention of the readers the ahādīth related to the subject matter – non payment of zakāh.

Non Payment of Zakāh – A Cause of Famine

Buraydah radhiyallāhu ‘anhu relates that Rasūlullāh said, “The nation that withholds zakāh (i.e. does not pay it), Allāh afflicts famine on them.” (At-Tabrānī)

Ibn ‘Umar radhiyallāhu ‘anhu relates that Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam once said, “O Muhājirūn! There are five (dreadful) sins; if you fall into these – and I take refuge in Allāh from the evil of these sins lest you fall into them – (you will face horrible disasters)…” The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam thereafter enlisted a number of sins and their punishments, amongst which he said, “Thirdly, if people stop paying zakāh, rain will be withheld from them, and were it not for the animals, no rain would fall on them.” (Ibn Mājah, Al-Bazzār, Al-Bayhaqī) A similar hadīth is also reported by Ibn ‘Abbās radhiyallāhu ‘anhu.

Non Payment of Zakāh – A Cause of Windstorms, Earthquakes, etc.

‘Alī radhiyallāhu ‘anhu and Abū Hurayrah radhiyallāhu ‘anhu report that Rasūlullāhsallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam prophesied fifteen actions which his Ummah will perpetrate, and from amongst these he mentioned, “When zakāh is looked upon as a penalty (i.e. people will pay zakāh with a heavy heart, as though it is a penalty), then look for violent windstorms, earthquakes, men being swallowed by the earth, metamorphosis, stones raining down from the skies, and calamities following one another in rapid succession, like beads of rosary falling one after the other when its string is cut.” (At-Tirmidhī)

Destruction of Property

‘Umar radhiyallāhu ‘anhu narrates that Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said,“Wealth is generally lost on the land and the sea because zakāh is not paid on it.” (At-Targhīb)

‘Ā’ishah radhiyallāhu ‘anhu narrates that Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said,“Zakāh will destroy wealth in which it is.” (Al-Bazzār, Al-Bayhaqī)

The destruction of wealth upon which zakāh is obligatory will be by way of Allāh ta‘ālādestroying the wealth in which the amount due for zakāh lies, or by removing the barakah from it.

Consequences in the Hereafter

“As for those who hoard gold and silver and do not spend it in the way of Allāh, give them news of a painful punishment. On the day it (i.e. the wealth) will be heated up in the fire of Jahannam, then their foreheads and their sides and their backs shall be branded with it and (it will be said to them), ‘This is what you had accumulated for yourselves. So, taste what you have been accumulating.’” (9:34-35)

The majority of the Sahābah radhiyallāhu ‘anhum and ‘Ulamā are agreed that the severe punishment mentioned in the verse is for those who do not pay zakāh. May Allāh ta‘ālā protect us from such severe punishments. Āmīn.

“And let not those who hoard wealth, which Allāh has bestowed them with from His grace, think that it is better for them. No, it is worse for them. That which they hoard will be made into a collar (in the form of a snake and put around their necks) on the Day of Qiyāmah. To Allāh belongs the inheritance of the heavens and the earth. Allah is All-Aware of what you do.” (3:180)

Imām Ar-Rāzī rahimahullāh writes in his tafsīr, “This verse does not apply to the cases of nafl (optional) spending. It applies to cases of failure in obligatory spending.” This is substantiated by a hadīth in Al-Bukhārī that Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said,“The person on whom Allāh bestowed wealth, and he does not give zakāh on it, then on the Day of Judgement, his wealth will be transformed for him into a large bald snake with two black spots over its eyes; it will wind round his neck on the Day of Judgement, then grab (him) with both his jaws and say, ‘I am your treasure.’” Then Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam recited the above verse.

Abū Hurayrah radhiyallāhu ‘anhu reports that Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallamsaid, “If anyone possessing gold and silver does not pay what is due, then on the Day of Judgement his gold and silver will be made into sheets and will be heated in the fire of Jahannam. His side, forehead and back will then be branded with (the heated sheets), again and again, on that day, the duration of which will be fifty thousand years.” (Muslim)

Once, Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam saw gold bangles on the hands of two women. He inquired if they had given zakāh for the bangles. They replied, “No.” Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said, “Do you wish that on the Day of Judgement you be made to put on bangles of fire?” They replied, “No.” He said, “Give zakāh on them.” (Ahmad)

The following facts are clear from the aforementioned discussion:

•       Zakāh is fard.

•       The significance of zakāh is very great.

•       Failure to pay zakāh will bring calamity and misfortune in this world and the Hereafter.

Allāh, the All-Merciful has bestowed upon us many favours: He has given us health and wealth, luxury and comfort, friends and children, life and wife. Every penny that we earn is from the Grace of Allāh. He has given us everything and asks for only 2.5% to be spent in His way upon those who are not capable of providing for themselves. Remember, 2.5% at the end of the each Islamic year from the excess wealth (i.e. which remains after spending) is basically nothing. If we pay zakāh in full and abstain from greed, extravagance, etc. there will not remain a single destitute among the Muslims. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam’s ḥadīth is clear evidence for this claim. He said, “In the wealth of rich Muslims, the amount which is sufficient for the poor among the Muslims has been made obligatory. The hardships of the poor among the Muslims regarding food and clothing are because of the deeds of the wealthy (i.e. their refusal to pay zakāh). Beware! Allāh will demand a stern reckoning from them and mete out a painful punishment.” (At-Tabrānī)

Bear in mind that anything we leave behind is not ours. If we want to protect our hard-earned money and save it for use at a time when we shall need it badly, let us spend it in the way of Allāh ta‘ālā and deposit it in the bank of the Hereafter.

© Islāmic Da’wah Academy

 

Love for the Masjid

By Hadrat Mawlānā Muhammad Saleem Dhorat hafizahullāh

It should be the desire of every Muslim to be in the House of Allāh ta‘ālā at all times. A Muslim should feel that if he had no commitments, he would have spent his entire time in the masjid. The heart should always yearn to be in the place most beloved to Allāh ta‘ālā. Any place beloved to Allāh will certainly become beloved to the person who has love for Allāh ta‘ālā, and Love of Allāh ta‘ālā is an essential requisite of Īmān. In one hadīth Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has said: “The most beloved places to Allāh ta‘ālā are the masājid.” (Muslim)

Even when he is occupied with matters of the world, such as family, work, etc., the heart of a Muslim should always be attached to the masjid. The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has stated in one hadīth that the condition of a believer outside the masjid is that of a fish out of water. A fish obviously has no desire to be out of water and if it is taken out, will long to return, and will remain restless for as long as it is out of water. In the same hadīth, the sign of a munāfiq (hypocrite) has been described as a bird in a cage, longing to be released therefrom as soon as possible. A munāfiq anxiously waits for the salāh or speech to end, so he can leave. The point to reflect upon is that do we feel restless outside the masjid, longing to return to it, and if not, then are we not displaying the sign of a munāfiq?

This hadīth encourages us to inculcate love for the masājid, thereby visiting them frequently and remaining within for as long as possible. If for any particular reason, or due to worldly necessities, one cannot remain longer in the masjid, the desire for staying longer and the urge to return at the first opportunity should at least be present in the heart. It is indeed regrettable to witness that even when not preoccupied with necessary commitments, many Muslims, at salāh times, remain sitting at home or wandering the streets instead of attending the masājid and performing salāh. And even if they do attend, they will make a point to come as late as possible and leave immediately after salāh, only to ‘hang around’ outside with friends. Many have become so negligent that in their haste to leave, they discard the performance of sunnah mu’akkadah as well.

The sunnah salāh has been divided into two categories, mu’akkadah and ghayr mu’akkadah. The sunnah mu’akkadah are those, which Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam used to perform with punctuality, and exhorted the Ummah to do the same, except on a journey when there is scope for omitting them. Sunnah ghayr mu’akkadah are the non-emphasised sunnah salāh, which Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallamused to perform on a regular basis but had omitted them at times as well, so that the Ummah could differentiate between the two. Many people never perform these at all.

Nowadays, we tend to believe that the sunnah ghayr mu’akkadah (the non-emphasised sunnah salāh) are those which Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam only performed occasionally. This is the definition that we have in our minds today. This is the very reason why we find a very small number of people performing the sunnah ghayr mu’akkadah. This is indeed a very grave misconception. We should make it a point to perform these with the regularity they deserve.

Coming back to the main topic, I wish to stress once again that love for the masjid (which is indicated by the desire to be present therein) is a necessary requirement. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has said: “There are seven (types of persons) whom Allāh will give protection with His Shade on the Day when there will be no shade except His Shade:…(one of them is) a person whose heart is attached to the masjid…” (Al-Bukhārī, Muslim)

If, however, such inclination does not exist within the heart, then it should be created by  compelling oneself to come to the masjid at least fifteen to twenty minutes before jamā‘ah (congregational prayer) time and engage in some form of  ‘ibādah. If one finds it difficult to come any earlier than the jamā‘ah time, then one should try and spend some time after the salāh. Moreover, it would also be beneficial to participate in the regular durūs (lessons of Qur’ān or Hadīth) or similar Dīnī lectures that take place in the masjid. 

The benefits of visiting the masājid are numerous. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has said: “He who purifies himself in his house and then walks to one of the Houses of Allāh for performing an obligatory act (salāh), one step of his will wipe out his sins and another step will exalt him in status (in Paradise).” (Muslim)

Furthermore, just by entering the masjid with the right foot, one would be gaining the immense reward of practising a sunnah of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam. By reciting the prescribed du‘ā (for this occasion) another sunnah would be accomplished. By making the intention of i‘tikāf, at the time of entering, the entire time spent within the masjid will bear the reward of i‘tikāf as well. Besides, one’s presence in the masjid (provided one does not engage in talking about worldly matters) will save one from impermissible speech and actions, which may possibly have been carried out by one outside the masjid.

It has to be remembered that to engage in anything related to worldly affairs whilst in the masjid is not allowed. The acts permissible in the masjid are those which relate to the Remembrance of Allāh ta‘ālā, such as the recitation of the Qur’ān, dhikr, listening to speeches or durūs (lessons) of Qur’ān & Ahādīth, etc. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has said: “The masājid are constructed only for the Remembrance of Allāh and salāh.” (Ibn Mājah)

One more virtue of the masjid pertains to one’s closeness with the imām when insalāh. The closer one is, the more virtuous becomes one’s salāh. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has said: “If people came to know of the blessing of (saying) adhān and (performing salāh in) the first row, they would resort to drawing lots if they had to (to secure these privileges).” (Al-Bukhārī, Muslim)

As we are unaware of the reality of the spiritual world, we have become neglectful of even such great and virtuous acts. In order to understand this, it would help to cite an example in purely materialistic terms. If for instance, a masjid was to announce that all those performing salāh in the first row would be awarded a sum as little as five pounds, for every salāh, one would witness that the first row would be filled up well before the beginning of salāh. Although not a big sum of money, but multiply it by five (for the five daily salāh) and then multiply that by seven (for the seven days of the week), it would add up to a week’s wages. This would certainly attract people to the first row. Unfortunately, we haven’t accorded even the importance and value of five pounds to the virtue mentioned by Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam.

Dear friends, when we come to the masjid, we should endeavour to obtain a place in the first row. We have plenty of time to talk and gossip outside salāh times. Leave all the mundane activities for another time and come and sit as close to the imām as possible. We should realise that there is a force keeping us away from this reward (and other such rewards) and this is the evil force of shaytān. We have to learn to fight shaytān and endeavour to get closer to Allāh ta‘ālā.  

INTENTIONS FOR GOING TO THE MASJID

Many intentions can be made when going to the masjid. Remember, for each intention a separate reward will be attained. Listed below are some possible intentions that can be made.

1. To perform salāh.

2. For going to the House of Allāh ta‘ālā.

3. To obtain reward for the time spent while awaiting the congregation of thesalāh.

4. For the limbs to be safeguarded from sins.

5. For nafl (optional) i‘tikāf.

6. To remember Allāh ta‘ālā in seclusion.

7. To meet fellow Muslim brothers.

8. For the reward of salām (greeting other brothers).

9. For reciting the du‘ā when entering and leaving the masjid.

10. For reciting the Qur’ān.

11. For an opportunity for amr bil ma‘rūf and nahy ‘anil munkar (to enjoin what is right and forbid what is evil).

May Allāh ta‘ālā forgive our sins and overlook our shortcomings and may He grant us the correct understanding of Dīn and His Pleasure. Āmīn.

© Islāmic Da’wah Academy


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Masjid or Musalla?

By Mufti Abdurrahman ibn Yusuf Mangera – 29 Ramadan 1425

masjid1

What exactly is a masjid? Is there a difference between a masjid, musallâ, and jamât khâna, etc? These are questions which need detailed discussion.

Nowadays, in the west, many Islamic Centers being managed include, among other things, a prayer hall, musallâ, or jamât khâna. Some communities rent an industrial unit, a store front, a house, or an apartment in which members of the Muslim community gather to perform congregational prayer (and in many cases social activities). Many communities actually have purchased property which they consider their masjid.

Which of the above can technically be considered a masjid, and what are the related rulings?

There is a difference between a masjid and a musallâ (or jamât khâna). A musalla (or jamât khâna) literally means a place where prayer is performed or where congregations are held, or worded differently, any temporary place in which worshippers congregate to perform their prayers. A musalla is also a place that has not been made an endowment or not yet intended to become a permanent masjid until the Last Day. In many cases, it is a temporary place from which the community will transfer once they find a more suitable, convenient, or permanent location. Though Muslims today commonly refer to their “musallâ” as their “masjid,” which the literal meaning of masjid (a place where the prostration is made) allows, a musallâ cannot technically be considered a legal [shar’i] masjid. Likewise the reward for prayer in a musallâ is not the same as in a proper masjid.

The Masjid

The masjid is a sanctified area, in which the rewards of prayers in congregation increase 25 to 27 times and where the mercy of Allah descends. It is considered the best of places by the Messenger of Allah (upon him be peace). Ibn ‘Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) relates:

Masjids are the houses of Allah on the earth. They shine up to the inhabitants of the heavens just as the stars in the sky shine down to the inhabitants of the earth (Tabarânî).

A true masjid, in the legal sense, is a place that has been permanently dedicated to Allah for the sake of prayer, recitation, and His remembrance. Any piece of land that has been dedicated permanently for the sake of congregational prayers will also become a proper masjid. The great Hanafî scholar of Egypt ‘Allâma Tahtâwî states:

Know that for it [piece of land] to be considered a masjid, a building [or structure] is not necessary. Tahtâwi, Kitâb al-Waqf, Ahkâm al-masjid and Qâdî Khân 4:712).

A masjid is normally made into a waqf or endowment (sometimes difficult to establish depending on the legal connotations of endowment in some countries). However, once a masjid is erected, it will always be a masjid and the property of Allah. It cannot return to being the property of any person or community even those who may have paid for establishing it. ‘Allâma Haskafî writes,

If the inhabitants surrounding the masjid wither away and the masjid becomes desolate, it will still remain a masjid according to Imam Abû Hanîfa and Imam Abû Yûsuf until the Last Day, and the fatwâ is on this opinion (Hâwî al-Qudsî)” (al-Durr al-Mukhtâr 3:371).

The Messenger of Allah (upon him be peace) said,

All the earth will disappear on the Day of Judgment with the exception of the masjids for they will join with one another (Suyûtî, Jâmi’ al-Shaghîr).

Designation of a Masjid

A masjid (to become a masjid) must be formally designated by the committee or persons in charge. They do this by defining the area it will occupy and its boundaries. Along with this they can designate other adjoining areas to be used as bathrooms, lobby, storage, etc. The latter however will be considered the auxiliary areas of the masjid and, though part of the endowment, will not classify as “masjid” area that was previously defined by the committee. Therefore, it is possible, for example, to designate only the front half of a large hall (i.e. the first 10 rows) as the “masjid,” while the rest of the hall is classified as a musalla. Once the front half has been designated as such, then that part, both above and below it, becomes a shar’i masjid. This means that neither above it nor below it on any floor can be used for anything but as a masjid. Hence, all rulings that apply to a masjid will now apply to the exact same area directly below it on each of the lower floors (including the basement); and likewise on all floors above it. Constructing toilets, bathrooms, or holding any non-suitable activities above or below the “masjid” area will also be impermissible. However, it is permissible to have toilets or bathrooms constructed out of the boundary of the designated masjid area on any of the floors, since those areas will be considered the auxiliary area of the masjid and not technically the masjid itself. ‘Allâma Haskafî writes in his well-accepted text al-Durr al-Mukhtâr:

“It is prohibitively disliked to have sexual intercourse above the masjid. Likewise it is disliked to urinate or defecate above it because it is a masjid to the peaks of the heavens (Ibn ‘Abidîn adds, “Likewise to the recesses of the earth below”) … it is disliked to enter any impurity into it.… [However] these are not disliked above a room which has been just set aside as a masjid [in a person’s home] nor in the room itself, since that is not a shar’i masjid.… It is permitted for those in a seminally defiled state or menstruating women to enter into it [i.e. a musalla or place especially prepared for ‘Id or funeral prayer] just as is permitted into the extended yard of the masjid [i.e. the overflow area].… (al-Durr al-Mukhtâr with Radd al-Muhtâr 1:441-442).

Hence, no area of the actual masjid prayer area can be excluded from the masjid once designated as a masjid. However, before the plans are finalized and the area is designated a masjid, portions can be excluded from any of the floors above or below where the masjid will be, to be used for something else that is related to the masjid, for instance, a storage area, office for the imâm, a basement for storing masjid amenities, a shop to bring in income for the masjid, etc. Ibn ‘Abidîn writes in his Radd al-Muhtâr,

If they build a room above it for the imam then there is nothing wrong with that, because that is part of the welfare of the masjid. However, once the construction [designation] of the masjid is completed then they want to add a room, it will be prohibited [to change the designated masjid area and add a room for something else in it]. If the committee states that we had intended to do such, their statement will not be upheld [in court] (Radd al-Muhtâr 3:371).

Likewise the Egyptian jurist Ibn Nujaym writes,

It states in the Mujtaba that it is not permitted for the guardian of the masjid to build shops in the masjid or in its courtyard [i.e. the courtyard in which salats are performed during summer in hot countries – also known as the external masjid] (al-Bahr al-Râ’iq 5:249).

Storage Areas and Water Reservoir Above or Below a Masjid

A masjid can have a storage area above or below the actual prayer hall. The storage space below the prayer hall however must be used solely for the amenities of the masjid and must have been designated as such in the masjid’s design phase. Likewise, it would be permitted to have constructed a water reservoir underneath the masjid (as in some Muslim countries). It states in the al-Durr al-Mukhtâr,

If they make a basement beneath the masjid for its welfare [however, ‘Allâma Ibn ‘Abidîn adds here that this should be of limited area], it would be permissible just as is in the Masjid in Jerusalem (al-Durr al-Mukhtâr ma’a ‘l-Radd al-Muhtâr 3:370).

A Residence or Bathrooms Above or Below a Masjid

Although it is permissible to allocate certain parts of the masjid as a room for the imam and other uses from the original plan, bathrooms or a complete apartment for the imam should not be planned directly above the actual masjid area, even during the masjid’s initial design phase, since it is impermissible to have sexual relations, relieve oneself, etc., above or below a masjid. In any case, adding a residence or office to the existing masjid area will not be permissible after the masjid area is designated. ‘Allâma Ibn ‘Abidîn writes,

“It remains [to be ruled], whether it would be permissible if the person making the endowment designates lavatories [bayt li ‘l-khalâ’] to be directly beneath the masjid, as is the case in Masjid Mahallat al-Shahm in Damascus. I have not seen a specific ruling on this. Yes, it states in the Chapter of Endowments [of al-Durr al-Mukhtar] ‘If they make a basement beneath the masjid for its welfare it would be permissible’ so ponder” (Radd al-Muhtar 1:441).

Ibn ‘Abidin however only mentions this analogy between a storage basement and bathrooms in passing, stating that it is an issue in need of further deliberation. It is not based on any strong analogy.

Islamic Centres and Musallas Today

In the case of large Islamic centres today, which include a prayer hall, the prayer hall area could be considered the shar’î masjid, if it has been intended and designated as such. However, the adjacent rooms, such as the lobby, dining hall, children’s room, gymnasium, or offices would be considered as supplementary or extensions of the masjid and hence, not part of the shar’î masjid area, even though they would be part if the endowment [waqf] (i.e. not returnable to any one’s ownership), but the rulings would be different for the two as we will highlight below.

Women in Menstruation

A menstruating women or one who is experiencing post natal bleeding or a person in a seminally defiled state is prohibited from entering into a masjid. The Prophet (upon him be peace) said:

I do not make the masjid lawful for the menstruating women or the one experiencing post natal bleeding (Abû Dâwâd, Ibn Mâja, Tabarânî, Zayla’î has considered it sound [hasan] 1:193-194).

Young Children in the Masjid

It is unlawful [haram] to bring in infants or young children into the masjid if there is a possibility of them polluting the area of the masjid. If they are in diapers and less likely to pollute any part of the masjid, it will still be somewhat disliked (makruh tanzihan) to bring them as they could be carrying filth in their diapers (Radd al-Muhtar ‘ala ‘l-Durr 1:441, Al-Ashbah wa ‘l-Naza’ir, al-Qawl fi Ahkam al-Masjid 407). The Messenger of Allah (upon him be peace said.

Keep your infants and the insane away from your masjids (Sunan Ibn Maja, babu ma yukrahu fi ‘l-masjid).

Sleeping & Eating in the Masjid

It is disliked to sleep or eat in a masjid without the intention of i’tikâf or unless one is a traveler (al-Ashbâh wa ‘l-Nazâ’ir 407)

Congregation for Five Daily Prayers in the Masjid is a Communal Obligation

A congregation for the five daily prayers have to be established in a masjid otherwise the local inhabitants would be sinful for negligence, since it is a wâjib to perform the congregational prayers for the locals in the masjid. ‘Allâma Ibn ‘Abidin writes regarding tarâwîh prayer which is a confirmed sunna and not wâjib:

The apparent purport of their [jurists] statement is that it is a communal sunna to perform it [tarâwîh] in congregation in the masjid, to the extent that if they performed it in congregation in their homes, and no congregation took place in the masjid, they would all be sinful (Radd al-Muhtâr 1:473).

Hence, if this is the case for a confirmed sunna congregation, it would be more binding to have a congregation for every obligatory prayers in each locality. The Messenger of Allah (upon him be peace) said,

There is no salât for the neighbor of the masjid except in the masjid (Dâraqutnî, Hâkim from Kashf al-Khafâ’).

Conversation in the Masjid

It is likewise disliked [makrûh] for one to speak about worldly affairs in the masjid, ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) had designated a special place outside the masjid where people could go and talk.  Ibn ‘Abidin writes,

(It is disliked to speak in the masjid) this is  regarding that talk which is of [a] permissible nature, [and] not regarding other than that which would warrant much greater sin (i.e. if one were to speak of it in the masjid) (Radd al- Muhtâr 5:269).

The Musallâ or Temporary Place of Prayer

All the above restrictions (i.e. that it is disliked to speak of worldly matters in the masjid, etc.) do not technically apply to a musallâ since it is a temporary place for worship. Hence, it can have apartments, bathrooms, etc., above or below it; or itself even turned into such (i.e. an apartment), once it is no longer used as a musallâ. However, it is recommended to treat it as a masjid, since it is being used for similar purposes.

A third floor musallâ within an industrial complex, which has other activities and businesses operating on the other floors (basement included), cannot be considered a shar’î masjid, but rather comes within the definition of a musallâ. ‘Allâma Haskafî writes,

If the basement was designated for any other use [i.e. not for the masjid] or he [the owner] made a room above it and faced the door of the masjid to the street [meaning he made it separate], then it cannot be a masjid. Hence he may sell it… [if he wishes, since it does not become an endowment] the same as if he had made [a portion from] the middle of his home into a masjid, and permitted for the adhân to be called therein – it would not become a masjid.

‘Allâma Ibn ‘Abidîn comments on this by saying:

The reason for the place not being a masjid is because the additional rooms are not designated for the welfare of the masjid. This is explicitly mentioned in the Is’âf, where it says, “If the basement or the floor above it is endowed for the benefit of the masjid or they were properly endowed for that then it would become a masjid (Shurunbulâliyya). It states in al-Bahr [al-Râ’iq] that the summary of this [issue] is that it is a condition for it being considered a masjid that the lower and upper floors need to [also] be a masjid, so that the rights [and ownership] of people is waived from it, as Allah says ‘And verily the masjids are for Allah…'” (Radd al-Muhtâr 3:370).

Although similar laws should be observed in a musalla as in a masjid, since it is emulating a masjid, it is not legally necessary. Therefore:

  • It would be permissible for menstruating women to enter into a musalla to attend classes or lectures.
  • Performing prayer therein would not hold the same reward as praying in a masjid although it would be more than in the home. A hadîth related by Ibn Hajar al-‘Asqalânî from ‘Abdullâh ibn ‘Amr ibn al-‘As states that the reward for a congregation with one’s family members (aside from in a masjid) holds 15 times the reward of praying alone, whereas praying it in the congregation in the masjid holds twenty five times the reward. Ibn Hajar al-‘Asqalânî concludes that the 25 times extra reward is confined to performing it in congregation in the masjid and not in a congregation performed at home. See Fath al-Bârî 106, Mirqât al-mafâtîh 3:145, and al-Bahr al-râ’iq 1:346
  • It would be permissible to eat or sleep in a musalla without having the intention of i’tikâf, which is necessary in the masjid for one to eat or sleep.
  • One can also perform Tahiyyat al-Masjid in a musalla.

A useful setup for women’s prayer could be that there be two room: one connected to the back of the men’s prayer area, which could be intended as being included in the shar’i masjid; and another room behind the first room, which could be a musalla or a multi purpose room for menstruating women or women with children to stay in.

http://www.zamzamacademy.com/2010/08/masjid-or-musalla/

Nikah

ring~ Nikah ~

When a man and a woman get married, both their Iman also get completed.

So may your bond be strong as husband and wife,

And may Allah ta’ala grant you a happy, blissful and beautiful life.

May Allah ta’ala fill your marriage with honesty and care,

And make sure you treat each other fair.

May your hearts be filled with everlasting love,

But make sure you always remember and obey the One above,

May you become a piece of each other’s heart,

So that you miss each other when you’re apart.

May you become a means of each others happiness,

And also help each other through sorrow and sadness.

May Allah ta’ala grant you blessings in this Nikah,

As He did to the marriages of the Holy Prophet to

Sayyidah Khadijah RA and Sayyidah A’ishah RA

May Allah ta’ala bless you with righteous and pious children,

Who’ll become a means for you all to get united in heaven.

But if in your marriage you face test after test,

Observe patience and show gratitude and you will become the best.

If either of you makes a mistake please learn to forgive and forget,

Because this is the teaching that the Holy Prophet has set.

If ever you have any arguments please remember it’s from Shaytan,

Who will always try to destroy one’s marriage and Imaan.

Always try to fulfil each other’s right,

And then In Sha Allah the future for you will be bright.

Finally, may Allah ta’ala grant you in this life tranquillity,

Happiness and abundant Barakah,

Subsequently in the life after

Grant you both the highest level in Jannah. Ameen.

Source: Al-Mumin Magazine

29th JamadulThani 1436