Tips For A Successful 💖💖Marriage.💝💖

T’s of a Successful marriage:447968696489

❤T Is for Taqwa – the foundation of a successful marriage. Fearing Allah allow both parties to live in harmony.
❤T is for Trust – don’t allow any room for your spouse to doubt you and give them some personal space.
❤T is for Tongue – control your tongue when speaking to your spouse. Don’t speak rudely.
❤T is for Talk – Communicate with your spouse regularly. Let them know your feelings.
❤T is for Time – make time to spend with your spouse, and realise that your life timetable has to change once you’re married.
❤T is for Tea – make sure you eat and drink together at the same time as this creates l♡ve between two people.
❤T is for Tolerance – nobody is perfect, but look at the good qualities in your spouse and tolerate the bad with patience.
❤T is for Technology – technology can make or break a relationship.. Don’t allow it to become the third person in the relationship. (Excessive Facebook, WhatsApp, etc??)
❤T is for Trouble makers – don’t allow the rumors and comments of others spoil the harmony between you and your partner.
❤T is for Temper – this is one of biggest reasons behind marriages breaking. Control your anger with your spouse.
❤T is for Tahajjud – wake up in the night for Tahajjud and even pray together, also encourage each other to do good deeds.
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Lessons On Marriage

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1. EVERYONE YOU MARRY HAS A WEAKNESS
Only God has no weakness. Every rose flower has its own thorn. If you focus too much on your spouse’s weakness, you can’t get the best out of his/her strength.
 
2. EVERYONE YOU MARRY HAS A DARK HISTORY
No one is an angel, therefore, avoid digging one’s past. What matters is the present life of your partner. Old things are passed away. Try to forgive and forget. The past can’t be changed. So focus on the present and the future!
3. EVERY MARRIAGE HAS IT’S OWN CHALLENGES
Marriage is not bed of roses. Every shining marriage has gone through its own test of hot and excruciating fire. True love is proved in time of challenge. Fight for your marriage! Make up your mind to stay with your spouse in time of needs. Remember this is the vow you made on your wedding day!
4. EVERY MARRIAGE HAS DIFFERENT LEVELS OF SUCCESS
Don’t compare your marriage with anyone! We can never be equal, some will be far in front and others far behind. To avoid marriage stresses, be patient, work hard and with time, your marriage dreams shall come true.
5. TO MARRY IS TO DECLARE A WAR
When you marry, you must declare a war against enemies of marriage. Some of the enemies of marriage are: Ignorance, Rumours,  Prayerlessness, Unforgiveness, Adultery, Third Party Influence, Stinginess, Stubbornness, Lack Of Love, Rudeness, Wife battery, Laziness, winning, nagging, PRIDE,  Divorce etc. Be ready to fight to maintain your marriage zone.
6. THERE IS NO PERFECT MARRIAGE
There is no ready made marriage anywhere. Marriage is hard work, volunteer yourself and perfect it daily. Marriage is like a MOTOR CAR with a gear oil, gear box, etc If these parts are not properly maintained, the car will break down somewhere along the road and expose the occupant to unhealthy circumstances. – Many of us are careless about our marriage… Are you? If you are, please pay attention to your marriage.
7. GOD CANNOT GIVE YOU THE COMPLETE PERSON YOU DESIRE
God gives you, her or him in form of raw materials in order for you to mold what you desire. You may desire a woman who can pray for 1 hour but your wife can only pray for 30 minutes. With your love, prayer and encouragement, she can improve.
8. TO MARRY IS TO TAKE A RISK
You cannot predict what will happen after marriage, as situation may change, so, leave a room for adjustment. Pregnancy may not come in the next 4 years.. You may get married to her because she’s slim but she becomes a little fat after a child. He may lose his beautiful job for years that you have to take the financial responsibility of the family until he gets a new job. But with God by your side, you will smile at long last.
9. MARRIAGE IS NOT A CONTRACT, IT IS PERMANENT
Marriage needs total commitment, love is the glue that makes a couple stick together. Divorce starts in the mind. Never think of divorce! Never threaten your spouse with divorce. Choose to remain married! God hates divorce, though it’s permitted only in extreme cases.
10. EVERY MARRIAGE HAS A PRICE TO PAY
Marriage is like a bank account. It is the money you deposit into your bank account that you can withdrawn. If you don’t deposit love, peace and care into your marriage, you are not a candidate of a blissful home. There is no free love in marriage, You cannot love without giving and sacrificing.
May God grant us the grace and wisdom to succeed in it. Amen!!! Send it to married and single people on your contacts list.
Anonymous
Zainab 20151202_221608

Children Activities

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by Zahra Anjum
Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem
There was a time in our childhood when the local television showed only half an hour of cartoons every evening and that was that. However, children nowadays have a 24/7 access to everything they want. These movies and cartoons are the main form of entertainment these days. When children go chanting ‘I’m bored’ this is the entertainment most of us are likely to provide.
While some may disagree with me and think that they are harmless, I find these programs extremely distressing. Yes, they are very convenient babysitters but are too damaging for the soul. Two months into watching one, and I can see the effects on my six-year-old son. The constant background music, the inappropriate language, and a downpour of un-Islamic values; how can we expect anything good to come out of it?
As keen parents, we tend to look out for alternatives that are healthy, educational, and enjoyable. Practicing Muslims do not die out of boredom; they do have fun in many other ways! Below is a list of halal entertainment means that you can enjoy as a family.
Outdoor activities:
Swimming, archery, and horseback riding are some activities recommended by Prophet Muhammad (saw). In addition to that, children can enjoy playing different sports like football, badminton, and cricket. Young children also like to do cycling, skipping rope, and playing hopscotch.
You can also set up a simple obstacle course in your garden for children to complete and have a variety of races with them like sack race, three-legged race, lemon and spoon race, and so on. Moreover, children will love playing traditional games like tag and hide and seek. Think of all the games you played as a child and teach them to your kids.
Indoor activities:
When they can’t play outdoors, there are plenty of indoor activities that can keep them occupied:
Board games – Scrabble, Risk, Monopoly, Pictionary, Twister, Cluedo, Guess Who, Snakes and Ladders, Ludo, and so on.
Card games like UNO.
Paper and pencil games – Tic Tac Toe, Hangman, Dots and Squares, Name/Place/Animal/Thing.
Indoor hide and seek, treasure hunt.
Oral games – I spy, Chinese whispers, 20 Questions game.
Puzzles:
Puzzles help develop patience and cognition skills in children. You can buy some age-appropriate puzzles that are easily available in the market. Moreover, children can also make their own puzzles with the help of paper, cardboard, or Popsicle sticks.
Building and creating:
More architectural and creative children can enjoy constructing forts, cities, and models using building blocks, Lego, construction paper, and modeling clay.
Science experiments:
Plenty of science experiments can be done at home using common kitchen ingredients. Search for some experiments, and try them with your kids. Some ideas can be found here and here.
Arts and crafts:
The Internet is brimming with ideas for kid-friendly crafts. Things like paper, old newspapers, old boxes, and cans can keep those young ones busy for hours. We just need to guide them to a craft that interests them, for example, origami, paper mache, and so on.
Gardening:
Children find it very interesting to plant seeds, tend to the garden, and water it. They can perhaps have their own individual corners in the garden or pots to plant in and look after. They will be able to observe the magnificent creation of Allah and have fun at the same time.
Books:
How can we forget books! Surround your children with colorful and interesting books, and they will for sure grow up with a love of books. Read aloud to them in an engaging manner; children do not like being read to in a monotonous voice. When they have learnt to read, both stories and non-fiction books will keep them entertained.
Even those children who do not like reading do enjoy books that match their interests, for example, a boy who loves trucks will love a book about trucks.
Museums and parks:
Take your children to parks and museums where they can learn and enjoy at the same time. Going for a walk or visiting friends and relatives can be fun too.
Videos, video games, and apps:
Although there should be a limited time for screens (which no doubt is very difficult to maintain), this does not mean they are prohibited altogether. Video games and apps that do not have un-Islamic elements like immorality and music are permissible and can be played, provided its usage does not exceed limits.
Moreover, videos about nature, technology, space, and sports can also be shown if they conform to the above principle.
1 Safar 1438

Ten Tips for your Marriage

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Life in a marriage can be tough when you have no idea how to make things work or how to keep your spouse happy. Thankfully there are some relatively easy ways to keep your marriage healthy by simply adopting some ‘non-negotiable’ rules in your home:

#1 Showing respect – Every individual deserves respect – ESPECIALLY your spouse.

#2 Be affectionate –  Love makes people feel valued, so show your spouse you love them and don’t be shy. Hold hands, kiss your spouse goodbye and hold on a little longer when you hug

#3 Always communicate – Your spouse is not a mind reader! Tell your spouse what you need and clearly communicate this to them

#4 Forgive quickly – No one is perfect and a good marriage thrives on forgiving and letting go

#5 Show kindness – A happy marriage takes two people who are kind to one another – always

#6 Appreciate your spouse – There is nothing worse than being taken for granted. A simple thank you is all it takes

#7 Loyalty – You should only ever have eyes for your spouse as if they are the most important person in your whole world

#8 Balance your time – A good marriage has balance between work, friends, family and each other as well as time for yourself

#9 Be honest – The fastest way for your spouse to lose trust in you is when you hide or lie about major things in your home. It simply isn’t worth it

#10 Consult in decision-making – It is from the sunnah to consult with one another in all big decisions – and doing so increases your love and respect for one another

20 Jamadul Awwal 1437

Intentions for marriage

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1.      I intend to enter into this marriage and take this wife (or husband) for the love of Allah ‘Azza-wa-Jall ’

2.     To have children so that the human race shall continue.

3.     I also intend [to enter this marriage] for the love of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, so that he may take pride in it, as he said: “Marry and  increase in numbers, as I will take pride in you before other nations on the Day of Judgement.”

4.      I have intended in this marriage—and all the actions and words that come from it—to be blessed by the prayer of a pious child; or for his intercession if he dies young before me.

5.      I have intended by this marriage to protect myself from Satan, by breaking the desire, [and thus] breaking the temptations of Satan, to lower the gaze, and reduce the Wiswas (withdrawing whisperer).

6.      I have also intended to protect my private parts from lewdness (illegal intercourse).

7.      I have intended in this marriage the amusement of the self and to bring joy to it through by companionship (with my spouse); looking, and playing freely and to bring comfort to the heart and strengthening it for worship.

8.      I have intended in this marriage the relief of the nafs and cherish it through companionship, the pleasure that comes through gazing at one’s spouse, mutual foreplay, the repose that floods the heart and strengthening it for worshipping.

9.      I have intended by it, the relieving of the heart from the worries of housekeeping, cooking, sweeping, making the bed, cleaning the dishes and taking care of lively duties.

10.  I have intended by this marriage, to struggle with the nafs and to train it ‘through care and guardianship’, to fulfill the rights of the family and to be patient with their characters, to endure the harm that comes from them, to work towards making them good, to guide them to the religious path, to struggle to seek lawful earnings for them, to command them to discipline the children by also asking from Allah for it and success for his sake and to drop between his hands and to show the excessive need towards Him in gaining it. I have intended all the previous for Allah Almighty.

11.  I have intended all the previous and more from whatever I control, say and do in this marriage for Allah Almighty.

12.  I have intended in this marriage whatever Your righteous servants and Your acting scholars have intended.

Allahumma, give us success as you have given them, help us as you have helped them. Overlook our shortcomings, accept [this] from us and do not entrust us to ourselves, even for the blink of an eye. Make good for us, all of the previous, by Your Grace and Generosity in good and in good health.

Allahumma, forgive us and have mercy upon us, be content with us and accept from us. Enter us into paradise and save us from the hell fire and make good all of our affairs. Allahumma, grant me in everything—in this marriage and all of my affairs—Your Help, Blessing and Peace. Protect me from preoccupying myself with other than You and do not put obstacles between me and Your obedience and make this marriage sufficient and virtuous for me. Allahumma, I—my moments of movement and stillness—am entrusted to You, so protect me; wherever I happen to be, take my affairs as You have taken the affairs of Your pious servants.


Remember me in your duas,

 
Alaa Khurdei
18th Jamadal Awwal 1437

This Could Save Your Marriage:

7 important factors that men need to know and understand about women & female psychology in order to ensure a successful relationship. Also, 7 important factors that women need to know. Refer to the link below for a detailed PDF book In Sha Allah.

http://www.mediafire.com/view/q34821ccyn6fydl/Like+A+Garment.pdf

What WOMEN need to know about men…

What MEN need to know about women…

For further videos & advice:

http://www.likeagarment.com/